Drowning

Today I am drowning in a sea of voices
Telling me to be 
Only what they want
But I just want to be me.
I'm always expected to be perfect
And live a life well at ease
I'm supposed to be smart and strong
But that's not really me.
I can feel myself drowning 
Underall these voices
Never able to break the surface
Or even make my own choices.
I'm failing everyone
Lalling steadily faster and faster 
Into darkness, a world not mine
I land in a soft, silent pasture.
I head for the grass face-down
And cry my heart out
I just lay there sobbing
'Til I'm too exhausted to cry out loud.
The sweet meadow envelopes me
Into its grassy arms
So tenderly, balancing me so gently
And calming me with its charms.
The ground is speaking to me
Bringing me closer and closer within 
I can finally let go of perfection
And what I had put myself in.
I surrender softly, easily
And let the world take me and sway
Off to new surroundings I go
To new lands far, far away.
Now I'm in the ocean
Casting all emotions out to sea
Leaving me replenished and calm
And I'm ready to accept the real me.
Once again, the ocean pulls me
But I am no longer there
I'm flying above the crashing waves
Letting salt breezes flow through my hair.
I'm up in a sky of pastels
The color is sprinkled with stars
Angels collect them gracefully
And off again, I fly far.
Back into the meadow
But I'm strong and ready now
No more tears or struggles for perfection
And no longer shall I drown.

Copyright © Kristen Wilson | Year Posted 2006

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