Tom Bell Poet Burlesque

Droopy Drawers

Another true tom tale;

Not too long ago
I did really own
A pair of 
Fruit of the Loom briefs,
One detined to make me groan

For sure, it had,
Seen a better day,
And up until this time
I now surely wonder why
I did not throw the damn thing away...

See, I wore them under 
my sweatpants,
Turned out I would have preferred
To bear a nest of ants...

Ever try walking
With your shorts down
to your knee?
It's very much unpleasant
And a sight to see...

Your constantly grabbing
At your groin,
As if you were in pain,
Or perhaps you seem
One totally insane

And you walk like
You've stepped in a
bear trap,
Or maybe horsey-dung
When I finally got home
I'd see how far they could be flung

But in the meantime,
life was torture
I felt like such a fool
What was I thinking of?
I sure did not look cool...

I walked like a penguin,
With antsy-antsy pants,
Grabbing at my loin,
At every possible chance...

Stupid does as stupid is
I'll never doubt that fact
When I got home,
I ordered up a stack
Of brand new underwear
And that was not all
I ordered suspenders
To wear underneath
So my briefs don't fall!

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