Dr Office Waiting Room Incident

Halfway through my doctors appointment I notice my shirt is on inside-out. I discretely try to make my way to the bathroom without being noticed and as soon as I flick the light switch on the only bulb in the tiny bathroom blows. So I'm struggling to fix my shirt...flailing around in the pitch dark...knocking crap off the counter and finally make my way back to my seat...I plop down into the chair only to realize the shirt is now on backwards ?? Well I figured I could pull my arms in and twist the shirt around real quick like just like when I was younger....(but much thinner). Halfway through I'm already regretting this decision because the sweat on my back from the hot ass waiting room isn't letting the 110 freakin % cotton shirt slide smoothly around my muscular physic (muffin top) Just about then the nurse comes out and calls my name...I panic and a loud ripping sound echoed throughout the waiting room followed by some giggles from a chubby kid with tha chickenpox. I composed myself and went in the back to be weighed, had my temperature taken and blood pressure measured which was borderline, go to the freakin ER, considering the waiting room/shirt incident of 2016. Hopefully they can give me a shot that will make me feel better....but this time when the nurse is preparing the shot I'll make sure not to expose my entire right ass cheek only for her to turn around in shock ?? and tell me the shot goes in the arm (exposed buttocks of 2014)...now to go get a new shirt and start my workday.