Jeff Connelly | + Follow Poet |
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Dosage

growing up
my body 
stopped

sane brain
chemicals
that are in

others naturally
passed by me
completely

stopped

reflecting
because
not absorb

ing i've been
reflecting
lately on

my childhood
and misunderstood
of who i was or would

become

so many factors
in making a fact
ory made human

being by being
programmed
without yet

within but not
knowing what
is missing and

so i grew up

a short history
no mystery of
what i've be

come since Mum was 
always randomly turn
ing the radio dial of

reality so we grew
knowing and knew
all styles and forms

but adding more

my Dad military sworn
dictated discipline but
also liberalism since

he was an artist of many
sorts and banned books
were in our library

paint was freely fingered
for feel and application
no matter what our

family's destination

on the move from 
place to place
always some

thing new to see and
taste leaving a mind
open that had already

been cracked i look
back and remember
what doctor's didn't

know then

so now here i am
in the here and now
thinking i'm a free

thinker but as music
plays continuously
in my elevator mind

i'm going up and or
down without a
ground wire

so now i am

a brain in a b movie
beaker keeping
kept in bodily

form from turning
Virginia Woolf or
Platt or perhaps

Hemingway since
i'm a man so can
relate but too late

my psychiatrist

and i have found
a proper balance
in mind meaning

my mind for what
was not provided
for if so Darwin

would have had me
extinct by now not
able or capable

to survive

so pharmaceuticals
balance my attitude
and keep me alive

then after years of
song singing i was
being bored

by the musical form
so changed my mind
to my university degree

i had for all time

then i knew not
by chance but
a strictly not

happenstance
when you were
introduced to

me, i, like a junkie
had the fix and
like an election 

my votes are all in
and as i A D D
i simply need sleep

and 
another
dose of

you

Copyright © Jeff Connelly | Year Posted 2019

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