Dithering With Hesitation On Brink of Abysmal Precipice

Infinite pitch black void zooms, I vacillate to pitch headlong (head over heels) where freedom looms large (think) cosmic size grand canyon grooms espouses, and cloisters unbridled wedded bliss structured sound of silence booms. Dawdling against inevitable fate temporarily holds in check (mate) eternal salvation woebegone grievance to ameliorate repurposed conscious being (me) sanguine reunion ridding travesty once for all ascending soul asylum gilded gate consanguinity amidst deceased brethren impossible mission to discern, thus I equivocate. At long last doomed existence finally fancy free and footloose Earthly afflictions divine creator severe trials and tribulations let loose promise body, mind and spirit triage damn physical, mental, and spiritual afflictions permanent vamoose yoked Sisyphean and mephistophelean woe summoning herculean strength (mine) to vanquish courtesy (halloo) gibbet welcome noose necks stop outer limits analogous cooked goose. Neither family nor scant friends twill mourn severance outlook linkedin inextricably forlorn accursed psychological agony since I got born incessantly pilloried courtesy bullies hood scorn yours truly convenient scapegoat raked over hot coals preferable versus insidious, nefarious, and opprobrious suffering post traumatic stress disorder wartorn invisible battle scars branded me, yet well worn shell shocked comfortably numbed skull jimmied heavily inebriated distilled, cracked corn trumpet silenced (think) muted horn. Anger at self wells up regarding passive stance (mine) convenient akin to jellyfish, and/or crustaceans without spine essentially a dorky nerdy wimpy kid i.e. faulty genetic design unsure if attributable to Capricorn zodiac sign essentially allowed, enabled and provided easy excellent access akin to scavengers to dine bitter draughts synonymous quaffing quinine figuratively forced down gullet - nein letup liberally heaped upon bobble headed, I opine courtesy 20/20 hindsight, a tangential pact with Sue S. Side, promising starvation diet package deal plus absent I, (now a tan gent) unwittingly did cosign.