Disorganized Episodes of Existance

i erase existance when i see you everything exists when you walk by i would give up my existance just for a hint of eye contact from you you only notice my existance in the throws of my imagination thinking of you, i try to hold back my tears fear feels like thorns piercing my ghostly anatomy there is one particular throbbing that just may lead me to blindness however i will take that risk just to elongate the existance of you in my mind i become an addict on purpose and by choice i become dependent on my version of your sweet, gentle voice if i only had one chance, one opportunity, or one moment, i would freeze that existance within the confines of my mind the image of us in a circle of any type of bliss causes convulsive catastrophes i force the existance of the multifarious feelings to just remain remaining i am internally pleading for you not to disappear from the simplest region of my sight yet you do as always, and i am left with another date with disorganized episodes