dance with the devil

like a miserable cockroach he wriggled
through wreckage in the sump of his life
bottle in hand and at delirious mouth
in a macabre rehearsal of final strides

what had once been a passionate waltz
had become a legless inebriated pirouette
moribund madness personified 
liquified insanity stumbling to hell
with wings of destruction in overdrive 

it was a sink hole leap towards the abyss
each jump digging deeper and faster
into the rock bottom of body mind and soul

eventually all music and heart stopped
yet he remembered cacophonous decrescendo 
enough to wake up from self-inflicted catatonia

like a phoenix and still tarred and feathered by booze
he decided to rise again whatever the cost

the rest is a miracle and sober blessing and still
he knows that Icarus had pinions of wax
therefore he stayed close to new foundations 
of hard-won truths and the reality of his privilege
Copyright © | Year Posted 2025

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Anaya Avatar
April 19, 2025 at 4:54 PM
They say the miracle comes to those who lift themselves towards the light. Wonderful ~ Anaya
Neumann Avatar
April 20, 2025 at 12:16 AM
Heavy lifting sometimes ...Thank you and kind wishes, Kai
Junaid Avatar
April 15, 2025 at 3:00 AM
I love the way you write, Kai. As someone who has struggled with addiction (albeit not alcohol addiction but another type), this poem hits particularly hard. It hurts to read this and see a part of me, but I know we all can find a part of ourselves in other people. We're all humans after all. Keep writing, and be blessed, always - Hiba :)
Neumann Avatar
April 18, 2025 at 9:00 AM
We are indeed all humans. I have been on a wonderful journey, from the gift of desperation to the gifts of recovery. XXX Kindest regards
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