Cowboy Rookie

He drove up to the Triple "T" Ranch in his brand new Cadillac!
In his air-conditioned trailer wuz his Arabian steed an' the finest tack!
He'd dreamed uv bein' a real workin' cowboy since he wuz a tad,
So he fitted hisself out with the latest fashions there wuz to be had!

On his Tony Lama alligator boots he wore a pair uv silver-plated spurs.
Over his Calvin Klein jeans he wore deerskin chaps to stave off the burrs.
He wore a hundred dollar Stetson hat an' fancy vest uv top-grade suede,
An' slung low on his hip wuz a 44 in a leather holster uv the finest grade!

His git-tar wuz slung on his back - across his shoulder wuz a coiled rope.
The grizzled cowpokes chawin' their terbaccy saw in this feller little hope!
They wuz loungin' 'round the corral railin' not believin' whut they saw!
He strolled their way remindin' them uv rhinestone cowboys on Hee-Haw!

First thing he said wuz, "When do we dine and I prefer silk sheets on my bed!"
An ol' cowpoke in scruffy boots an' jeans asked, "Whut wuz 'at you said?"
(The thoughts crossin' them cowpuncher's minds had best be left unsaid!)
"Son, you'll sleep in the top bunk tonight an' beans an' bacon you'll be fed!"

The ranch foreman trotted over to see whut the hullabaloo wuz all about.
"You fellers let me handle this! Ya'all git back to work!" he said with a shout!
He sized the lad up sayin', "Son, I ain't impressed with all them fancy lables!
Begin yer career with this here manure fork!" an' he sent him to the stables!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Copyright © | Year Posted 2011

Poem

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Kendrick Avatar
October 3, 2013 at 1:49 PM
Ahhh!! Got a chuckle..Enjoyed your winning work..Congrats..Sara
A  Avatar
October 3, 2013 at 11:07 AM
Bob, lovely win............SKAT
Lamoureux Avatar
October 1, 2013 at 7:16 PM
This was a whole lotta fun pardner! Congratulations Jack.
Hamilton Avatar
October 1, 2013 at 3:41 PM
Bob congrats on 3rd in team work contest Ty for entering Shadow x smile
Ball Avatar
July 2, 2011 at 3:17 PM
This was a goodun my friend. Loved every word and the imagery is great. God Bless, JB
Wesley Avatar
June 24, 2011 at 7:41 PM
As usual, your wonderful style shines brightly in this.
Francis Avatar
June 22, 2011 at 7:14 AM
Bob as you probably know I am a horseman. I love the see the outfits that some people wear on our rides. Most of the clothes show off the mud and dirt from there falls fairly well! Loved it Bob- Thanks for the comment on Muse! it means a lot coming from someone whose writings I treasure!- Mike
Johnson Avatar
June 18, 2011 at 6:36 PM
I knew something ironic was a coming, with this fancy critter strumming, The "new chum" took up plumbing:) with the fork around the back:) brings a smile to this weathered dial, you have it boy, don't let it slack ... on ya blue, Don
Foulk Avatar
June 18, 2011 at 3:50 PM
this one brought tears to my eyes, not from crying , it was so funny, this has to be in your top 10, loved the way you ended it. thank you for commenting on Father's Day Wish.
Onclaud Avatar
June 18, 2011 at 12:12 PM
friggin' heelarious, robert... definitely a fashionable interpretation of THE man on a horse! :) huggs, nette
Taylor Avatar
June 17, 2011 at 8:36 PM
Love theses western tales, Sarge. Can't wait to see the movie! Quite a chuckle! Splendiforus, my friend. Have a super weekend. Thanks for your kind words. Ralphie
Devonshire Avatar
June 17, 2011 at 5:41 PM
:) Bet this Rhinestone Cowboy didn't expect to be pitching manure, Bob. We do tend to glamorize the lifestyle of cowboys, but it's a tough job. (Still, always wanted to be a cowgal when I grew up. Is it too late?) LOL Very witty, Bob! Love, Carolyn
Johnson Avatar
June 18, 2011 at 6:42 PM
Carolyn, You could always come a droving, on the stock route we'd be roving, sleep neath the stars, an rough it on the track, where the dingoes howl at midnight, n the sandgoannas fight with brown snakes, and the air is sweet as honey, but there isn't any money, and you wash in rivers sometimes outback. Don
Kendrick Avatar
June 17, 2011 at 5:36 PM
Now he is a lowly cowboy..Got a chuckle..Wonder how long he lasted on that job...Sara
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