Confusion

Thoughts scurrying in my head like underground commuters - pushing, bustling, focused only upon themselves with no care for others - reaching for the last remaining hang strap or seat. Words tousling for attention; some trying to scream the loudest, while others sulk in silence, hoping I will notice their drooping lip - occasionally slamming the doors of concentration. Distracting me from mundane tasks the nagging voices in the background of my single-mindedness, pulling - this way and that - lurching from decision to indecision, from certitude to the uncertainty of next move. Manic dance to wavering music - now here, now there, shilly-shallying to discordant melody and rampant orchestration. Confused conductor, misguiding brass and strings producing a cacophony of sound - a jarring, jangling din. STOP! Let me try and restore order! All sit down, calm down, SHUT UP! Stand in a neat line, so I can see straight - consider my options. Put down your instruments, let them be soundless. Freeze frame! Motionless. I stand before the still of the image. In one corner there is 'do this', in the other 'do that'. The mayhem surrounding them frozen. Grimace fixed for eternity. While I hover in a place of indecision; fingers plugging my ears; eyes blinded by perplexity. On closer scrutiny I see 'alternative', nestling in the background, quietly waiting for recognition. I see it now, so clearly. I pick it up, it conforms to my touch, We leave together by the back door. Frozen frame melting as movement returns to the manic confusion. Alternative and I in collusion, leaving indecision, and disharmony to slug it out, tip-toe to safety, hand in hand....ssh, close the door quietly, they may not even notice we have gone.