Helen J Radford Poet Free verse

Confusion

Thoughts scurrying in my head 
like underground commuters - 
pushing, bustling, focused only 
upon themselves with no care for 
others - reaching for the last 
remaining hang strap or seat. 

Words tousling for attention; 
some trying to scream the loudest, 
while others sulk in silence, 
hoping I will notice their drooping 
lip - occasionally slamming the 
doors of concentration. 

Distracting me from mundane tasks 
the nagging voices in the background 
of my single-mindedness, pulling - 
this way and that - lurching from 
decision to indecision, from certitude 
to the uncertainty of next move. 

Manic dance to wavering music - 
now here, now there, shilly-shallying 
to discordant melody and 
rampant orchestration. Confused conductor, 
misguiding brass and strings producing 
a cacophony of sound - a jarring, jangling din. 

STOP! Let me try and restore order! 
All sit down, calm down, SHUT UP! 
Stand in a neat line, so I can 
see straight - consider my options. 
Put down your instruments, let them 
be soundless.  Freeze frame! Motionless. 

I stand before the still of the image. 
In one corner there is 'do this', 
in the other 'do that'. 
The mayhem surrounding them frozen. 
Grimace fixed for eternity. 
While I hover in a place of indecision; 

fingers plugging my ears; eyes blinded by perplexity. 
On closer scrutiny I see 'alternative', 
nestling in the background, quietly waiting 
for recognition. I see it now, so clearly. 
I pick it up, it conforms to my touch, 
We leave together by the back door. 

Frozen frame melting as movement returns to 
the manic confusion. Alternative and I 
in collusion, leaving indecision, and 
disharmony to slug it out, tip-toe 
to safety, hand in hand....ssh, close the 
door quietly, they may not even notice we have gone.

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Robert Davidson November 11, 2008 at 5:41 AM Excellent Helen and guess what poem I have had featured and is my poem for the competition in Jan. 2009 yep To Helen. Take care Robert

Sharon Winter November 11, 2008 at 5:26 AM Wow. Such an excellent portrayal of confusion. Felt like I could finally breathe myself at the end when you found your 'alternative'. Simply amazing. Love your poetry. Love, Shar

Kristin Reynolds November 11, 2008 at 3:05 AM Manic confusion - this is my life! My husband with ADHD among other things, and my 5 small children (2 with add/adhd also) my life, is madness. lol you described the sense of wanting to jump out of your own skin perfectly here, I was frantic just reading it!lol well done, love Kristin