Confused

CONFUSED The echoes of a voiceless begun Chattering enlarging through The rattling of restless thoughts No! It couldn't be, NO! Stop it! The cruising noise dimmed along Aligning temporary scrutiny Among the saints as they drifted The church choir can't stop either For the mass had just began Oh! Holy saints, holy than thou For the trumpet just began Lying in pervertness of stitches Frequently laying the foundation Not on the sinking ground though Clinging to the hymn book Singing 'stand up thee soldiers' For the battle had just begun On my armoured structure No reason not to turn up or.. Give way through a fading soul? Did I lose it trying to defend my own? I build it on the sinking ground And what will be the strongest pillar! Ringing of the bell can't ignore either Could I be losing it again and again? Speaking of the Dias maybe I Call me there and I will fall on you Struggling with childish ideas Conformed all along in dying crystals That build up in time of brightness The sun still shone and life had to continue I chose the path will lose the track Moreover the moon never gave up on me Darkness never had my place either Am I confused or my brains just melted?