Comatose

Sounds of medical monitoring machines Echo in the brain of a comatose marine Lying on a gurney hospital's bed Least of all, nothing is said Those present bow their heads Praying his not already dead Eye's flutter, the patient awakes, from their comatose state Ironically, the marine didn't pass through heaven's gate Risking life and limb then joining us again

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CayCay Jennings

Date: 2/2/2025 7:33:00 PM

How crisp the rhyme is, as is the tale that effectively entertains with slick brevity lines building up curiosity about the outcome and next delivers an unexpected ending - I love it when that happens. I am not certain, but feel regret that I may have stopped reading you for no other reason than intent fell through the cracks as developed by the busy-ness of keeping up with all things Soup - I dinna mean to ... CayCay

Andrew John

Date: 2/3/2024 2:25:00 AM

I like this one. Rather reminds me of one of mine, "Patients and Patience" (it's on here somewhere). My man was lying on a gurney or trolley being wheeled through a hospital - after some grief. However, I'm pleased you are "joining life again" here. Some nice thoughts in this piece, Michael. It's funny being reminded of something one has written, and admire someone else's poetry. It's almost like shaking hands.

Michael Craig
Date: 6/5/2024 8:07:00 AM

Sorry John, it took me so long to reply and thank you for your kind words.

Gordon Mcconnell

Date: 1/30/2024 3:09:00 AM

A nice short piece Michael with good rhyme and flow with expression. Have a good day, Gordon

Michael Craig
Date: 6/5/2024 8:16:00 AM

Thanks Gordon, for reading my work, this is what I think some of the lucky Military people go through. Sorry it took me so long to thank you, but I've been sick for some time, just gaining my strength back.