Classified Ad

"Wanted, girl Friday to be on her own, Take-charge skills -also answer the phone. Sophisticated office and the pay is high, Only the intelligent need to apply." First to be there at the appointed time Impeccably dressed and feeling so fine. Written exam and I'm through in a breeze. Finished it off with smarts and ease. Next, oral test and meet with Personnel, Final interview. This one is sure to tell. "Performance outstanding!" said the hiring guy. But didn't I catch a strange look in his eye? "Your skills are fantastic -your scores are an art. There's no doubt about it -you're certainly smart. Your I.Q.'s above average -you've got college to boot. Sure wish I had something such talent would suit." The truth always hurs but so seldom is told Lies are the same; never new and so old. He thanked me for coming and taking the test, We smiled and shook hands, he wished me the best. I know the folder he clutched tight in his hand, Should have been marked "Would have been grand." But he wouldn't say where he really was at, But he'll think as a finish -"She was too fat." It happens too often, it's nothing that's new, It hurts just the same, but what could I do? We fat one's have talent and what it would take, But we're judged by our size, what a lousy mistake! My brain's almost perfect -it's really not fat, And when I sit down, that's not where it's at. Tomorrow's the day that I really get mad, You'll know that you're reading MY classified ad. "Wanted, Employer -who hates working alone, I'll take up the slack -and answer your phone. I'm fat but ambitious and my starndards are high, Only the intelligent need to apply."