Character Vs Self

i drown myself in shallow streams my known noncompliance in the only reason i scream i hang myself from 4ft high i only flail because i know that i won't die i cut only a half inch deep i only cry because i know my life i'll keep i throw myself off a 10ft post and i do it again and again because i know that broken bones will be the most In the face of death my body pleads but my mind it screams because it knows that death is the one thing i need