Change

I am feeling the shock of fast change. How to cope with it is of course the question. Listen to Beethoven through the neighbor's window? Look up from the page? Appreciate doves even though they are so numerous? I seem to have limitless choices although this cannot be true. Could I have become a computer specialist? Sure! How to remain still in the ever-maddening mandala. To remain still on the outer edge of the wheel is to ride laughingly and pluck at the gold key. I force myself down into the craw of the black vortex New York until I feel the strong oscillations gather rhythm and expel me or accept me. What do I find within the black electric walls of this unique vortex? I find there is more space between people than I'd ever dared to hope. That my efforts are unnecessary and hopeless. I cancel my subscriptions and stop eating. I embrace wild roots and run through streets with arm around my girl. * * * What is important. That question. I part my lips in the middle and blow eat corn chips, dipsy doodles make love, eat grapes. In their mere chronology events have no relation. How was making love different from eating grapes. Differentiation is essential to bring order from chaos. The chaos is the accelerated change created by our own species whose consummations have a quantum effect on the environment. But the chaos existed long before, and long after us in both more serene and violent forms. Again a duality, but here's why. For each duality may then be said to be in a dual relationship with another duality, forming cubes. These cubes are difficult to join with other cubes, unless first they are somewhat melted. We were traveling among these cubes, maneuvering through a static array of equidistant points but finding it impossible to avoid striking them. So why the difficulty adapting. Because no species before us had to adapt to its own effects upon environment? No, every species must but our adaptations (of the world) are so successful (such fabrications!) One green, one brown Two dead leaves sleep-touching Then a breeze! * * * Loveliness and loneliness these periodic auras surrender to greater force, power, strength whatever it is called, the clog of heels upstairs to the door, turning of the key, the taking out of the garbage down below, car starting, placed in gear, cat meowing anyway, for myself, personally, speaking only for myself, because although the Parks Department rakes the leaves as it did last autumn, to keep them from clogging the sewer system, I am in a heightened state of vibration Quivering like a long steel pipe banged hard against an iron beam. The hard hat feels it in his hand (on the gears) but great buildings are built that nature destroys in time with a little wind water, fire air, you glide down through the limpid air toward the ninety-seven story abandoned structure remnant of an earlier civilization abandoned but not yet entirely swept away in slow waves of change.