Fred Lariviere | + Follow Poet |
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Cannibalism

Raped and left for dead
Tears still running down her eyeless head
Screaming her heart out
Which has been removed and stacked into my mouth
I only need my grinding teeth to make you paste
Shut the hell up and let me eat you in haste

Copyright © Fred Lariviere | Year Posted 2014

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Joel Thornton Date: 12/18/2014 12:00:00 AM NICE!! I love this ! Great Shut up and let me eat you in haste!~LOL ~Joel Login to Reply

Louis Nathaniel Date: 12/17/2014 11:37:00 PM The second to last line gives a strong image, but if I may, perhaps inserting a "my" before "grinding teeth" makes for a better flow? When I originally read it, I read it as if there were a "my" there. Well done. Pretty damn dark too, I like it. Login to Reply Fred Lariviere Date: 12/17/2014 11:45:00 PM glad you like it! I wrote this a couple years back, i was 16 or 15 at the time, disturbing for that but i like the work ive done in those times. My native language is not english so i will gladly look into what you proposed! Thanks!