Calming the Nerves

It's like a flamin' maze out here
where I'm looking for a name,
where hawthorn hedges line the fences,
and the crossroads look the same.

I'm up and down seems every road;
I've criss-crossed east to west,
as well as going north to south,
where I am cannot be guessed.

I've been through Catani twice,
and three times into Bayles,
so the road and house I'm looking for,
on me mate’s direction fails.

I cannot place just where I am,
with all this wasted time I spent,
then on a crossing close to Caldermeade -
bang! And I'm in an accident.

I was stunned there like a mullet,
with nerves tingling to touch,
I got out to see the damage,
which luckily was nothing much.

Then the fellow in his rusted ute,
stepped out looking pretty grey,
for he'd gone through a give-way sign,
where I had the right of way. 

He looked at his car, then mine
with a big sigh of relief,
for there seemed little damage,
were the words of his belief.

So back to the ute he sauntered,
returning with a drink, 
saying, “Mate our shattered nerves,
need a steadier I think.”

He handed me the bottle
with the cap on it undone.
I had a drink and then he said,
“Go on you have another one.”

I took a swig and then another,
and me nerves were back on track,
so I handed him the bottle,
and in the ute he put it back.

I said, “You didn't take a drink!”
And he replied to me “I know -
but you can bet that I'll drink plenty
after the coppers go.”
Copyright © | Year Posted 2019

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Marcum Wong Avatar
September 24, 2019 at 2:26 PM
What a conniving dirt bag that guy was. Sad to think there are some people like this in the world. I loved your classic ending that took me by surprise! A Fave for me Lindsay! Have a great week! : ) xxoo
Laurie Avatar
September 29, 2019 at 8:21 PM
Hello Connie … with social media, conmen, scammers, and blokes like this, we really do need to be on our toes these days Connie. Four grandkids coming Wednesday. Valium possibly needed - thanks Connie - Lindsay
Hinshaw Avatar
September 22, 2019 at 6:57 PM
Lindsay, looks like that other feller pulled a fast one on you! Hope you had some mints with you to clear your breath by the time the cops arrived! Another great write as usual! I agree, with your comment re Singing the Blues. Fellers always harmonize better when soused. Good on ye, Mate - Bob
Laurie Avatar
September 23, 2019 at 8:52 PM
G'day Bob … just got to watch some of these old farmers. They know all the back road tricks. I think too much grog has you thinking everybody must be deaf - thank you Bob - Lindsay
Proxenos Avatar
September 22, 2019 at 1:31 PM
A Good laugh Lindsay - a journey of adventure you surely went on, but your ability to write about these adventures is what it is all about - your last verse as always the punch line of this great story! Hugs, Jennifer.
Laurie Avatar
September 23, 2019 at 8:49 PM
Hello Jennifer … I can vouch that in this area with a hundred crossroads and everywhere looking similar if you don't keep your wits about you, either a rusted out farm ute, a hay bailer, or a manure spreader can suddenly appear in front of you - the punch tells it all Jennifer - thank you - Lindsay
Romios Avatar
September 20, 2019 at 9:36 AM
Hi Lindsay, totally enjoyed this poetic journey, you took us on.))) With joy, Panagiota And a FAV!
Laurie Avatar
September 23, 2019 at 8:44 PM
Hello Panagiota … I'm pleased you enjoyed this journey in rural dairy country where road crossings can be dangerous if there's a slip in concentration. A stiff drink to calm the nerves is not a good idea - thanks Panagiota - Lindsay
Wolf Avatar
September 19, 2019 at 2:23 PM
Another classic L.L. yarn. Hope this was for the Crossroads contest. It sure is a winner! :) gw
Laurie Avatar
September 23, 2019 at 8:41 PM
Thank you Gershon, but classic; not sure about that. Too much on the go and not enough time, so contests miss out Gershon - Lindsay
Cunningham Avatar
September 19, 2019 at 2:05 AM
Haha, oh this is a gem Lindsay. Tom
Laurie Avatar
September 23, 2019 at 8:38 PM
G'day Tom … probably happens more often than we know, as there's quite a few 'Arthur Daley's' around - thank you Tom - Lindsay
Leffanta Avatar
September 18, 2019 at 8:38 PM
I do admire your ability to make each individual his/her own person! Well done! Aloha! Rico
Laurie Avatar
September 23, 2019 at 8:36 PM
Thank you Rico, but I'm a very keen listener and observer to the utterance of annoyed people involved in circumstances that don't go their way - I just replace them with me - thanks Rico - Lindsay
Krutsinger Avatar
September 18, 2019 at 7:30 PM
A trickster for sure; and a great story.
Laurie Avatar
September 23, 2019 at 8:32 PM
Hello Caren … perhaps no insurance either, but a breathalyser test after an accident is mandatory here - thanks Caren - Lindsay
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace