Caffeine Addict

This very morning when I awoke, I thought someone had played a joke. I checked the pot, it was bone dry. I checked the pantry and started to cry - no coffee! So, I got dressed for work...real slow. I had no drive, no pep, no go. I drove to work, barely awake - I wanted to stop but I was already late - no coffee! I parked the car and walked inside, but when I heard the news I almost died. The vendor took the machine away, and it damned sure won't be back today - no coffee! The boss said that we should not worry, he'd send for caffeine in a hurry. But when it arrived, in thermos bright, it seemed to lack the usual bite of coffee. No Columbian or Kona blend, nor even French roast dwelt within. It was a mix, exotic flavors, that only yuppie scum could savor - not coffee! A mocha-chino-berry stink that no one in that crowd would drink. That morning dragged incessantly, and no one acted pleasantly - no coffee! When lunch time came we fled the scene of the luke-warm, slurpy, berry thing. We marched down to the restaurant and told the waitress, "All we want is coffee"! By end of day no one was tired. The caffeine high had everyone wired. I've learned my lesson, oh so well, that without coffee life is hell. And I'm an addict, monster, fiend, and slave unto the coffee bean - yeah, coffee.