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By accident

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By accident contest
Sponsored by Kai Michael Neumann
06/10/25 HMS 

As if by accident a fellow died an arrest denied did he fry on purpose no one cared no one ran in all kept silent, as if tongue tied one body burning, sheeting on fire a whore lit a smoke he got lost inside

Copyright © | Year Posted 2025




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Date: 6/10/2025 4:20:00 AM
You've done such an excellent job of setting the scene that I could see it all take place except for who, what, where and why the fellow died. It's an Etheree that reads like a script writer's notes... laying out the most important scenes for a movie, and you did it in rhyme! I'd watch it to see her go down in flames. A titch harsh of me? Perhaps.
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David Kavanagh
Date: 6/10/2025 5:40:00 AM
Thanks for your thoughtful comment Lin, I wanted to capture a fragmented, moment leaving the details vague on purpose and try create that disoriented feeling, I like your (script writer’s notes) idea it fits perfectly. And maybe the sequel will show her going down in flames! ;) cheers David

Book: Reflection on the Important Things