Frankii Fame Poet Free verse

Blind Force Denial

As I sit here and think about it

so many scarred memories, crashing
waves are thoughts of fate
that have been scorched with denial

blinded by a pit of despair, lonlier everyday
hiding within myself, hard to face the truth
the wheels screech down the road,

a narrow path driving insanity circles
as I push the gas pedal, I choke on the shambles
realizing where I f***ed myself in life

but I cant change the past, etched in glass 
shattered vows, drowning in a sewer 
my innocence lost, the keys locked inside 

a tortured mind sold every last integrity
dollar after dollar blown away by a gust
of advice that disappeared before accepting

I put my life on the line, russian roulette
foolish character flaw, strength beyond others
imagination lit a way out through trials

tribulations bleed the same miserable mistakes
walking through hell graceful on the tip
of an iceberg running barefoot, expectations 

slip my mind as I fall into temptation
wanting to be a hero, beat the devil who
twisted my soul into a knot, roasting

spit of reflecting truth bears a self-identity
acceptance of what I didn’t want to believe
who I was, now close to rock bottom, suffering

humanity turned away from fighting against
losing battles watching people swallow shame
blame catches fire through accelerated lies

close to a chasm allowing death to come
tortured dreams left deep scars, regret
I must willingly sacrifice the hypnotized

desire for the trance that I didn't need help
begging, scraping my knees on an unclean
temple floor I created, still willing for hope

chasing opportunities to survive a slowly
bleeding heart pumping life, thoroughly giving
existence awakening a new sense of purpose

time to face my own demons aware 
I will feast no longer on blind survival, slipping
through reality anew remains charred; yet, I learned

the struggle is real when you cannot commit.

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Caren Krutsinger March 19, 2019 at 1:21 AM This poem is poignant, heartfelt, and amazing. Frankii, I think the reason you have no comments yet is that it is difficult to read. The reader has to take a breath every so often. If you broke this up into stanzas, I think you would have at least eight to ten comments. People love to read things when you make it EASIER to read. Nicely done, my friend. Frankii Fame March 30, 2019 at 3:07 AM Here, what do u think? I think it worked out great. thx again. Frankii Fame March 28, 2019 at 2:01 PM I have been thinking alot about this, thank you. I agree, and am going to work it out into stanzas. However, I find it pretty awesome that you commented on exactly the poem and thoughts I was having... hmmm... lol Thank you again for the insight.