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Blackbird in September

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In dream lone blackbird sits on telephone line, pleading, what more do I have to give. Wing once beat out a metronome in time.. leaving thoughts lost through a sieve. I swore to rebuild our earthen dam, and hold the waters at bay. Your dream found a different plan, left nothing more to say. Race, now long finished, deemed total loss.., left my prideful soul entreating. Waste heart's song diminished, too high the cost, ask why the day so fleeting. Last candle's light gleamed in his glowering gaze, Write journal'd fate, no answer would he belie, September's temper teamed in shortened days, to kiss late remember'd lips good-bye.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019




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Date: 2/15/2020 10:41:00 PM
I found this poem to be poignantly beautiful and memorable, with superb imagery and rhyme. Thanks for sharing, Richard.
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Evelyn Judy Buehler
Date: 2/16/2020 9:47:00 PM
Thank you, Richard.
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Quoth TheRaven
Date: 2/16/2020 3:11:00 PM
Evelyn, Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I'm honored & humbled by one who writes with such beauty.,and knows. -Richard
Date: 10/26/2019 12:19:00 AM
I enjoyed this so very much! You know my favorite bird is the raven? Lol yea I fancy it my spirit bird if you will and that is my pen name too! This flowed perfectly and was s fascinating read!;)
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Quoth TheRaven
Date: 11/27/2019 10:54:00 PM
Brenda, Chalk drawings in the rain last longer. But long enough remembered. -R
Date: 10/15/2019 11:41:00 AM
Lines of sweetness, thoughts of goodness, a complete piece, wonderful craft.
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Quoth TheRaven
Date: 10/15/2019 11:12:00 PM
Funam, Thank you for the comment. I just read your poem 'An Unreachable Diamond In My Nest'. Looking forward to reading more of your emotive poems indeed. -Richard
Date: 10/13/2019 4:36:00 PM
Powerfully written.
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Quoth TheRaven
Date: 10/22/2019 12:02:00 AM
Juliet, Thank you for this comment. -Richard
Date: 10/8/2019 11:09:00 PM
Thank you to all that have commented. I appreciate you all. Afraid I wore my heart out on my sleeve. This one is personal, so I'm finding it hard to find the words. -Richard
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Date: 10/8/2019 8:36:00 PM
Pretty birdie, nice birdie...great poem...all the best QTR...^WW^ :o)
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Date: 10/8/2019 10:21:00 AM
For several years the municipality struggled with crows, and blackbirds began to return to the city. I saw their yellow beaks several times in the forest park near the house. But here is an imaginary bird, a poetic association, as far as I understand. For some reason, I think of King Thrushbeard)
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Date: 10/8/2019 6:10:00 AM
I watched a blackbird continually drop a nut onto concrete until it broke open. It was interesting seeing it think through the problem. I also was impressed by its perseverance.
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Date: 10/7/2019 2:34:00 PM
Ravens are associated with darkness and mystery, very vengeful birds! There is , a touch of despondency that lingers in this powerful poem - love the lines-'In dream lone blackbird sits on telephone pleading, what more do I have to give .......Your dream had a different plan, left nothing more to say' - Allan Poe's influence noticed here - a famous poet, and literary critic your ending is amazing 'September's temper.......to kiss late remembered lips goodbye' Awesome write Richard, Hugs, Jenn.
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Date: 10/4/2019 2:27:00 PM
So deep and beautifully penned !
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Date: 10/3/2019 12:42:00 PM
- I had to read this several times ... not because it was difficult ... but, it gave me so much ... phrases that are deeper than you may not have intended ... really interesting and excellent written, Richard :) - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
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Quoth TheRaven
Date: 10/3/2019 10:19:00 PM
Thanks for the interesting comment. -Richard
Date: 10/1/2019 8:51:00 AM
A wonderful mastetpiece with a touch of melancholy, Quoth.. Really enjoyed your gem.. This is an absolute fav for me.. Have a blessed day!!
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Date: 9/30/2019 10:49:00 AM
Poetically beautiful! Each line perfectly joining the next. A bit of darkness lingers.
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Date: 9/27/2019 8:25:00 PM
Powerfully beautiful in scope, had to fav as I love these birds. Magnificent piece.
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Date: 9/27/2019 7:16:00 AM
Since Connie gave you her favorite part, and it was also my favorite part, I am giving you my NEXT favorite part: "Your dream found a different plan, left nothing more to say. " Wonderful my friend. Trixie and I are both clapping.
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Date: 9/25/2019 10:38:00 AM
Such a gem - a true poetic write - I hope to read many more of your words. Your words a wonders. God bless you
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Date: 9/24/2019 6:08:00 PM
Richard, this gem is simply exquisite! My favorite line "Wing once beat out a metronome in time..". I adored this poem in its entirety! : ) xxoo
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Date: 9/24/2019 10:19:00 AM
Great read! Things do not always turn out the way we plan, nor do we get back, seemingly, even a small percent of the body and soul invested in a caring relationship...but there are precious jewels harvested from truly loving and selflessly giving, that even death cannot disparage.
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Date: 9/22/2019 9:15:00 AM
I agree wholeheartedly with every comment of praise made on this jewel my friend. Last four verse are icing on the cake and cap this exquisite piece so perfectly.. A fav-- a pure and tantalizing feast of verses.
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Date: 9/22/2019 8:30:00 AM
A powerful write my friend..every line is a metaphor that evokes life:..I swore to rebuild our earthen dam, and hold the waters at bay...Race, now long finished, deemed total loss..so well written, Richard!
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Date: 9/21/2019 3:34:00 PM
Andrea, Thanks for noting my melancholic doting. Might sound odd to Poe as such..he did revel in between the light & dark. More comfy in the shade anyway. Happy Saturday. -Richard
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Date: 9/20/2019 7:01:00 PM
very poetic and it has that "poe" touch of melancholy to it (which I so admire) WEll done!
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Date: 9/16/2019 5:27:00 AM
Such a poignant poem that ending is very powerful... one can feel the emotions, you set the scene up perfectly with your stark images... great penning :) hugs
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Date: 9/14/2019 9:46:00 PM
Maureen, Thanks for the comment. I've been away from the Soup write,,stuck in the numb. I was just reading your poem 'A Unicorn Walks Into A Bar'. I will be watching the contests..,may luck be yours with ruby red lips..and wiles my fine friend. -Richard
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Date: 9/14/2019 9:16:00 PM
I am struck by how each couplet shines like its very own poem. Captivating piece.
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Quoth TheRaven
Date: 9/21/2019 7:48:00 PM
Maureen, You know I went back and reread my wordy write. I like words that evoke. But I'll make this promise to never take your sweet 'Rosy Rose rose above the rows of roses'. -Richard
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