Premiere Contest WinnerBird of Paradise

The eye of the storm was to blame, Eve thought. Fruit, ripped from the twig, wicked to behold. Orbit of Adam, not at all thoughtful. Outside of paradise bird grows old.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2024

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Richards Avatar
November 2, 2024 at 1:20 AM
Congratulations on your trophy win, Kim. It has a touch of mythology woven into your poem. The bird growing old outside of Eden symbolises the loss of innocence and the burden of choices. The trailing rhyme (thought/thoughtful) was perfectly executed. See my soup mail for details to claim your prize.
Rodrigues Avatar
November 2, 2024 at 6:25 AM
Thank you, Suzette! :)
mysore Avatar
November 2, 2024 at 1:03 AM
beautiful dear poet. congratulations on your win. cheers!!!
Rodrigues Avatar
November 2, 2024 at 6:25 AM
Thank you, Thriveni!
Fowler Avatar
October 19, 2024 at 12:36 PM
Oooh…nice Kim! :)
Rodrigues Avatar
October 19, 2024 at 1:46 PM
Thank you, Linda! :)
Dietrich Avatar
October 18, 2024 at 7:55 PM
That's so cool, Kim. I really need to study what she wants and try it.
Rodrigues Avatar
October 18, 2024 at 8:03 PM
Hope I did okay :)
Hind Avatar
October 18, 2024 at 3:10 PM
This makes me feel a bit melancholic, "Orbit of Adam, not at all thoughtful" can relate to this poem
Hind Avatar
October 18, 2024 at 8:15 PM
Aw, thanks...<3 :) back at ya!
Rodrigues Avatar
October 18, 2024 at 8:03 PM
Sending you a hug :/
Vaso Avatar
October 17, 2024 at 11:21 PM
I must not be in paradise, a bird in a cage growing old LOL, nice poem.
Rodrigues Avatar
October 18, 2024 at 9:56 AM
Aww…truly we are trapped in bodies that must die. One day a new life in paradise! Hugs
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace