Big Foot Stinks

The dwelling place is in lofty mountain peak,
hidden from protruding human eyes that seek.
A lonely figure the Yowie cuts,
All contact from the outside world he shuts.

I saw him once, this hairy fellow,
a face so sad and eyes of yellow.
He stood on a ledge in sunshine's glare,
I dare not move, I could only stare.

His seven foot frame, large outstretched arms,
My fear set in I recited the psalms.
The agile beast toward me started,
My belly boiled and then..... I farted.

He got so near my eyes did close,
I peaked and saw that he covered his nose.
The fart I did, boy did it stink.
It caused the yowie's eyes to blink.

For just a moment I thought I had him cold,
but he recovered quickly and became quite bold.
With a sweeping motion he did pick me up.
and around his frame put my face at his butt.

I was upside down and in an awkward spot,
then he let one rip, gave it all he got.
On the richter scale, I'd rate it at ten,
It was the fart of about a thousand men.

So if you're out in the mountains for a quiet stroll,
beware of Yowie, big foot or some other troll.
If they encounter you, turn and their butt cheeks part,
they will surely unleash the most abominable fart.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016



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Date: 10/23/2017 4:04:00 PM
I love this it made me laugh so much. Tears in the eyes kind of laugh best ever today.
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Date: 6/14/2017 9:46:00 PM
Ha ha ha - flipping brilliant - had me laughing my arse off - Indiana x X x
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Old Man Emu
Date: 6/17/2017 10:22:00 PM
Cheers Indiana, glad you enjoyed a bit of fun.
Date: 5/19/2017 4:56:00 PM
ha ha ha absolutely hilarious Craig! I love a good fart poem and this is excellent:-) hugs Jan xx7
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Old Man Emu
Date: 5/20/2017 9:07:00 PM
Thanks Jan, for you visit and kind words
Date: 2/18/2016 9:14:00 AM
This is wonderful and lovely. Nice poetry here dear friend.
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Old Man Emu
Date: 2/19/2016 2:39:00 PM
Thank you for the comment and visit. Cheers Craig
Date: 2/6/2016 8:02:00 PM
Why Thank you, Craig, it's best of you don't LOL, I have a different take on it.
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Date: 2/6/2016 7:19:00 PM
I have a bog foot poem, I lost the flow in it. So I had to collaborate with my sister. Craig, LOL... to the end, I was not expecting that. I'll be sure to stay away from them woods. LINDA
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Old Man Emu
Date: 2/6/2016 7:53:00 PM
I will have to search for it and have a read. Cheers Craig
Date: 2/2/2016 4:10:00 PM
Good one..I liked the flow, rhythm, and rhyme putting joking aside..Thanks for the visit to my page..Sara
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Date: 1/25/2016 9:13:00 AM
Ha ha, definitely my laugh of the day.
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Emu Avatar
Old Man Emu
Date: 1/25/2016 12:39:00 PM
A fart story always tickles us humans, glad you could laugh at it.
Date: 1/23/2016 4:05:00 AM
Well Keith and ligella I have read some of his. Ha you are quite right. Some of it is good. He obviously had some pretty bad days
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Date: 1/23/2016 12:09:00 AM
hahaha! Hilarious my friend... I think that if I would have farted in such an awe inspiring presence I would have expected far more than a fart in return!!! Well done! Best wishes, Keith
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Emu Avatar
Old Man Emu
Date: 1/23/2016 4:07:00 AM
I suppose you are correct on reflection ha
Bickerstaffe Avatar
Keith Bickerstaffe
Date: 1/23/2016 12:16:00 AM
an example... They fuck you up, your mum and dad. They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the faults they had And add some extra, just for you. But they were fucked up in their turn By fools in old-style hats and coats, Who half the time were soppy-stern And half at one another's throats. (first two verses)
Bickerstaffe Avatar
Keith Bickerstaffe
Date: 1/23/2016 12:12:00 AM
Regarding Ligella's recommendation of Larkin, he IS good, but beware... he's a miserable S.O.B. !!!
Date: 1/16/2016 10:35:00 AM
I must say, this is one stinky poem; but fun. Enjoyed it very much
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Emu Avatar
Old Man Emu
Date: 1/16/2016 4:56:00 PM
Thanks, started off serious but got sidetracked. cheers
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