Betty C a True Story
Talk about embarrassment
You won’t believe how my day went
Joe and I went out to dine
Came back at a decent time
A storm had come – a storm had gone
Left every house with no lights on
We hadn’t bothered with a key
We count on electricity
To open up our garage door
That’s all we ever used before
Well, Joe had golf with early light
We had to get in the house that night
We looked for a window we could break
Here’s where we made our first mistake
The basement windows looked too small
There’s no way I could fit at all
So a garage window had to do
We broke it and I climbed on through
Joe’s upset, it cost three bills
I’d be dead if looks could kill
But bright and early Joe left home
And I was left there all alone
I called a guy to fix the window
But what size, I said I don’t know
So into the garage to measure it
He said he’d bring me one to fit
And with that I hung up the phone
Turned to go back in my home
But unlike any night before
We had set the knob to lock the door
I can’t believe – locked out again
Just in a towel and bare skin
I cracked the back door – looked around
Saw no one – I’m backyard bound
Back to a basement window sill
I have to fit – I hope I will
I take a hammer, break the glass
Whip off the towel there in the grass
I lay it down so I don’t cut
My ankles, calves or my bare butt
I slither in and hit the floor
Into the house through the basement door
I quickly dress – the repair man comes
And we’ve new windows at quite a sum
I learned some lessons as would you
If a day like this you had gone through.
Know through which window you will fit
If it ever comes to it!
A basement window costs much less!
Never go outside undressed!
A towel’s only good inside!
Learn the places you can hide!
And always carry your house key
Or know where an extra one might be !
It bares repeating – when your husband’s gone
Don’t get locked out with no clothes on!
This actually happened just about as I described to a neighbor of ours. It was
years ago and in another state but I still changed names to protect their standing in
the community.
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