Beer For Lunch

Today I'm having beer for lunch, Feck off if you disagree, With my Irish decision to drink this much, Hold on, I have to pee. Tinkle tinkle in this divey bar, Into a urinal that smells like whatever, Those weird little circles I splash on are, I bet they're made by Lever. I'm on a diet! It's called: Let's Just Get Drunk, Jenny Craig can go suck an egg, I bet I can lose these last few fatty chunks, If all I do is eat a keg. Beer is wheat and according to pyramids, We're supposed to eat six servings, And it makes you feel more spirited, Heck! Bloody Mary's a veggie, I am learning. So cheers to the day with beer for lunch, I'll kill two birds with a couple beers, To lose some weight without a single crunch, And feel better as each pint disappears.