Babble On
I shave every morning after making love to my wife at night;
My beard now drags across the floor.
If I had a nickel for every time that I was right,
The next time I am right I’ll have one cent more than four.
I am so tired I feel beat like a rented mule;
Seven days a week I must go to work.
Scratch my back with a chain saw and call me a fool;
For dropping out of college, I am such a jerk.
“Who licked the red off your apple”, is what she asks of me;
My mood is always kind of sour;
Civility lies buried in the grave with chivalry;
My days need another twenty hours.
I’d eat a one ton tomato, are the words I thought they sang
In that song from many years ago;
If the world really did begin with a cosmic blast big bang
Then Genesis is fiction, don’t you know.
If I had common sense it would be the pamphlet by Thomas Payne;
Though the pages would not be too well worn.
In a world all gone mad, normalcy makes you insane;
The civil contract, politicians have all torn.
If you had seen what I saw, you would saw the table in half
And crawl out the whole that the two halves now make;
If two wrongs make a right then I would be the one with the last laugh
As my life is but a series of mistakes.
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