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AUTISM

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If it weren't for conversations Arthur and I are having on the subject, I don't think I would have had the courage to talk about it here. So, thank you Arthur Vaso :)

I rise at the center of... Is it a room? This is a face. There is motion, too fast, too clamorous. Cryptic and opaque. Shapes shift into my field of view. Recognize! The message spoken ends in an upward curve. Interpret! It means a question ? ? ? ? What to respond, when.... I get nauseous. My body twitches, my mouth tics I make no sound I cannot speak. I cast my eyes down. Curl up, arms wrapped around self; Rock to calm down again; Count the tiles; Hum Rachmaninoff. What is this incomprehensible life? My soothing world is filled with letters and words, a keyboard, screen, and silent friends They speak to me in sentences and formulas of friendship and love... on my screen.. I am afraid I am always so very afraid Once I was somewhere else Locked up inside My head Once I was somewhere else I will not go back there I want to stay out.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2017




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Date: 5/26/2020 2:44:00 PM
so good to see this posted on the home page Darren, you are a remarkable young man and have found a lifelong friend in Art - miss you on soup:-) hugs Jan xx
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Date: 8/13/2017 5:48:00 PM
So glad you wrote this it helps me see inside or see another side, I wish for you peace and strength.. Beautiful Write :)
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Darren White
Date: 8/13/2017 10:47:00 PM
Thanks so much Glen :)
Date: 2/26/2017 10:37:00 PM
Darren, this is beautiful. I think I understand a little, especially if I relax and take in your words - there is lots of time. I'm glad you wrote it, and that fear was overcome. We all are so complex, and usually there are many fears inside - I've done precious little and you are an inspiration. Yes, my friend, stay out, stay out here with us.
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Darren White
Date: 2/27/2017 12:28:00 AM
I will, Doug. It's written to give people a one-time experience in how an autistic brain CAN work. I will stay out Doug, I'm doing well, thank you :)
Date: 2/25/2017 7:11:00 PM
It's very sad that so many today live with this condition, Darren. I think you expressed well what must be going through the minds of some of them so afflicted! You have an empathetic soul.
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Darren White
Date: 2/26/2017 12:47:00 AM
Thank you, Andrea. It is quite hard to express the things that are common to you, but strange to the outside world :)
Date: 2/25/2017 4:10:00 PM
Wow, Darren! This is an incredible expression of feelings and a glimpse into the lives of many. Thank you so much for sharing. I have two family members (both children) on the spectrum, one is verbal and one isnt. Your poem helps me understand their struggles. Thank you again for sharing some of your story...to my FAVES! Hugs, Rhonda
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Darren White
Date: 2/26/2017 12:47:00 AM
I am glad I have been able to help you a little bit. Thank you for the fav :)
Date: 2/24/2017 8:58:00 PM
An amazing write, and so creatively informative. My grandson has high-functioning autism. He's the sweetest little boy but has trouble relating to others and making friends. Blessings, Kim
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 10:54:00 PM
Yes exactly Kim, that is very difficult. Thank you :)
Date: 2/24/2017 5:31:00 PM
This explains your genius Darren. Autism brings with it such wonderful gifts. I am so thrilled you have literally come out of your box to communicate with us in such a dazzling way. Glory be!! He has been set free!!
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 10:52:00 PM
O hai Jean :) I am glad I can out of my box, and got to know you and all others here :)
Date: 2/24/2017 2:14:00 PM
Gorgeous poem. I was just reading of an autistic boy from neighborhood going to the world championships for speed skating in the special Olympics...a wonderful accomplishment
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 2:23:00 PM
Yeah! All the noise, light, people, distraction. The world is far too loud when you're autistic and the effort to participate is indescribably tiresome.
Date: 2/24/2017 10:48:00 AM
You bring us into YOUR world Darren - thank you for this enlightening piece - i wish more people would read it then maybe more would understand the frustrations of an autisitic person - having worked with Asperger's students for 16 years I do have a little insight into this theme and know how confusing the world can be to them:-( hugs jan xx
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 10:58:00 AM
Thanks Jan. If it weren't for your help, this Asperger would have run away from Soup screaming and flailing :) I can never express in words how much your humour and patience have helped me.
Date: 2/24/2017 8:56:00 AM
Darren this is an excellent piece. You have a voice that so many of us here treasure. You're a true artist, teacher and incredible person. A definite fav.
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 9:00:00 AM
Carol, I am humbled and thankful :)
Date: 2/24/2017 8:55:00 AM
Tremendous and so effective. I am impressed!
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 9:00:00 AM
I am awed that so many people appreciate this, I was afraid to write about it to be honest... Thank you!
Date: 2/24/2017 8:31:00 AM
I love how you put the reader into the thoughts of autism. So well done!
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 8:43:00 AM
Sara, thank you, my friend <3
Date: 2/24/2017 8:28:00 AM
I bow to your knowledge and talent regarding writing poetry Darren, excellent poem, a 7 and fav. for me.
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 8:42:00 AM
WoW Roy, thank you SO much for this!
Date: 2/24/2017 7:03:00 AM
Very well expressed Darren. Your talent for writing is a gift :)
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 7:21:00 AM
Heidi, thank you. I am glad you like this!
Date: 2/24/2017 6:43:00 AM
Once again your talent shines and your ability o poetic expresses a feeling or describe a theme is extraordinary. No wonder Jean Murray wrote that beautiful Acrostic for you.
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 6:52:00 AM
Jean did, didn't she? I am so touched... And now she has to win the contest of course ;) Thank you for your words and your compliments, my friend. Sometimes I wonder: shall I write about this? Is it not too much? Will it push people away? But seeing the reactions I think it is good.
Date: 2/24/2017 6:19:00 AM
You have written a fabulous poem, a poem that lets the reader experience a different perspective. Well done. An enlightening read.
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 6:21:00 AM
Thank you very much for the compliment!
Date: 2/24/2017 5:04:00 AM
Allow me to let you entry stand. Your words not to mention your layout and formatting describe this situation. I have a friend who has a child of this and also a family member. Bless the children and the parents too. Their wold is unique. Well done
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 6:20:00 AM
Hello Lisa, thank you. If you can recognize this, it is mission accomplished for me :) It's incredibly difficult to give someone a quick view into your life or your head. So, again, thank you.
Date: 2/24/2017 2:38:00 AM
The best poetry lends the reader to experience what the poet feels; you have accomplished this beautifully. A 7 for this brave and honest write, and a warm thank you for sharing. :) Maureen
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 3:08:00 AM
Maureen, thank you so much for the compliment and the 7 :)
Date: 2/24/2017 2:22:00 AM
My friend has an autistic 3-year-old son, he is such a delight, I just love him to pieces! He'll be a genius I reckon, can already count to 100 and knows his alphabet backward. Such great insight in this poem, Duir.
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 2:37:00 AM
You know that it is even quite hard to put it into words in such a way that it is still poetry? Heh. Thanks Budgie.
Date: 2/24/2017 2:19:00 AM
Fear not. So long as you have a poem within you, you have nothing to fear. John
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Darren White
Date: 2/24/2017 2:35:00 AM
I luckily will always have poems in me. I connect through poetry. Thanks John :)