As the Memories Come Back

As the memories come back, My mind they attack. It seems they come non-stop, As my morale, it does drop. I do not know if they are real. Is it just something that I feel? What to do when they come, Of that, I feel so dumb. Sometimes my mind quickly races While it chases exact faces. If it is really true, Then from it I withdrew. I'm hiding in a dark cloud, While inner voices are very loud. They tell me to cry, But my eyes, they stay dry. I can not let anyone see How these thoughts effect me. I can never admit When happy feelings I get. For when these I do feel, The negative does quickly steal. Really I'm sad Though I try to look glad. I'm so afraid of what they'll think If into the depths I do sink. However, they say, "Tell us right away." But inward I object, For myself I want to protect. Part of me can not trust, Although they say it is a must. I've been let down before. Who can say what is yet in store? Nobody can be aware If my emotions I do not share. Should I bear it all? Would that be my downfall? I need to take it slow, And find which way to go. Do I continue to hold it in And go on a further downward spin? Or do I work for a release That the bad thoughts would now cease?