An Apple's Nightmare

He thought he was a MacIntosh,
but he'd not have his buttons pushed.
Alive until his life was stopped,
he was peeled and sliced and chopped.
Alive to the moment he would die
and baked into an apple pie, 
his last words shouted to his mom,
"Anoint me in nutmeg and cinnamon".
He beckoned a walnut from his shell,
crying, "You and I are going to fiery Hell", 
but covered in a blanket of crust,
he went to Heaven where all pies must,
bathed and buried in vanilla ice-cream,
he was only a delicious dream.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2026

Poem

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Dietrich Avatar
April 30, 2026 at 10:17 AM
Love love love it. A fave
Crandall Avatar
April 30, 2026 at 11:32 AM
Thanks, Andrea! Good 'ol apple pie!
Wolf Avatar
April 29, 2026 at 8:25 PM
Sounds as if he landed on the other side of the rainbow.
Crandall Avatar
April 30, 2026 at 11:31 AM
That's a good idea - the other side of the rainbow!
Rodrigues Avatar
April 29, 2026 at 1:25 PM
What a delicious dream…lol
Crandall Avatar
April 29, 2026 at 3:29 PM
haha, it is my waking daydream.
Greenhough Avatar
April 29, 2026 at 12:01 PM
This is another David Crandall "To Hell with the Diet" poem, and it's very good. My heart flutters to read of a decent apple meeting such an untimely end in a pie.
Crandall Avatar
April 29, 2026 at 3:28 PM
Haha, you're on to me. I think I've written about a hundred versions of this poem. But consider, there's no calories in reading or writing a poem. Yes, it is tragic isn't it the way that apple meets, or in this case, is eaten by his maker. Well, God makes the apple, and I take it from there, and make the pie.
Goldsmith Avatar
April 29, 2026 at 11:47 AM
What a cute/fun/creative write. Love this one. Are you baking apple pies??? Then I am ready to eat. Hahaha!!!! Oh yes, with vanilla ice-cream. Thanks for the laugh... Have a fun/blessed day writing away..............
Crandall Avatar
April 29, 2026 at 3:26 PM
Thanks, Paula! Actually, I'll be making an apple cobbler soon. I'm not skilled enough with crusts. You can be pretty messy about that with a cobbler.
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