Areesha Elahi | + Follow Poet |
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Almost Once Again

While there’s a lot to preserve from yesterday 
There’s much to dwell on and learn from 
Especially when you’re insecure and get easily carried away

Never patient, always impulsive, and too affectionate
A trio that featured as main characters in my downfall
And well, going against a bullseye intuition is what topped them all 

Time and time again, my gut whispered the truth
But how those lies I told myself were louder, I never knew

What I called optimism was me crowning my doubts
Little did I know, my insanity was making the rounds

I let myself down almost once again.

However, this time, I didn’t drown or hit rock bottom 
A surreal power pulled me out of what could’ve become a fierce problem

It was a whisper again, pounding my heart harder every day 
It kept aggravating till it turned into a scream expressing intense dismay

For once, I gave it attention and tried to decipher its message.

It looked like a hazard sign and sounded like a threat
Telling me not to go down that dubious road for another regret;
Asking me to kill another hope so my soul survives
Pleading me to trust this intuition instead of those deceptive cries

This time, surprisingly enough, I listened to my guardian angel
I realised at that moment how it has always been the most faithful;

Upon trusting it, I see a massive transformation in my perspective
Gone are the days I fooled myself with a made-up reality, 
That trickster in me is now buried in my past personality

Today, I am more at peace with myself than I’ve been in months
My wisdom has resurrected, and I’ve let my fears free for once

I have no regrets, no resentment; indifference is all that lives inside
It is, indeed, the most powerful state my mind ever needed to find

I’ve broken free from attachments, expectations, and erroneous hopes;
I don’t wait for good things; I find gratitude in every blessing that evokes

Now, I live every day as it comes; it’s best to go with the flow  
And so, I’ve decided, this is my new home, today and tomorrow.

Copyright © Areesha Elahi | Year Posted 2023

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