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Abonden Feelings

Hey, For you, it started Sunday night. For me, on Friday, it came to light. It’s dumb that I didn’t see the signs. How could I miss those warning lines? Yes, I was in love, it's true, But no reason for what you’d do. In front of people, you asked, While you laughed, my heart was tasked. I heard it all, it wasn’t funny. Spent time thinking, it felt so crummy. What did you mean, why’d you say it? I liked you, yet I felt the hit. Never mean, I should have been, But then sadness would have set in. "Pull yourself together," I’d say, When you insulted a girl that day. I gave you gifts, like a fool, Loved you more, breaking every rule. Sorry for writing, for giving much, You should’ve told me with a gentle touch. Embarrassed now, I must confess, When I was nice, it caused me stress. Heard you insulted my belief, Causing me endless grief. Catcalling others isn’t fun, It’s harmful and shouldn’t be done. But until then, you hadn’t harmed me, Still, it wasn’t hard to see. Without a thought, you’d find it funny. Walked home, slept the same, Yet still, I felt the shame. You said, "No need to give a gift," My heart felt a sudden shift. Then asked about the bet with Samx, You blocked me, no time to relax. Apologies I sent your way, But you never had much to say. Why block me, what did I miss? Your silence felt like an abyss. Back and forth, the messages went, Still, no response was ever sent. In class, our projects to present, You criticized, my heart was bent. Liam denied, said mine was good, Tried to distract, as best I could. Put a pen in Jake's hood, for fun, Mentos in my case, the damage done. Ran out crying, mind shut down, Tears in eyes, I wore a frown. Liam brought my things, to my surprise, Thanked him with tearful eyes. Near the stairs, you watched us there, Still, I felt you didn’t care. Sat away, trying not to cry, Thanks to Liam, I got by. Before school’s end, applause rang clear, For running the group year after year. But no more, I’d had enough, Just because your silence was rough. Teacher called your name out loud, Changes I felt, amidst the crowd. I’ll welcome a new me, with cheer, Maybe we’ll meet again next year.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




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Book: Reflection on the Important Things