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Abandoned At the Altar

ABANDONED AT THE ALTAR


You cast me aside
Like an unloved old rag doll
You no longer wanted me.
Jilted as your bride
Your betrayal took its toll
Where is my apology?

No explanation
Has been uttered by your lips - 
I was waiting at the church!
Humiliation
As my life is torn to strips …
forsaken, left in the lurch.

Contest: Sedoka Contest
Sponsor Laura Loo
Checked with how many syllables 5,7,7,5,7,7 

01~04~16

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Vladislav Raven Date: 2/12/2016 7:25:00 PM Hi Jan, another excellent write from your pen. Your words paint a sorrowful vision that is so true for some. The deep emotions sing true and they do touch the heart of he reader, bringing forth deep emotions. The sorrowful Imagery feels so real. The picture also adds to the words Jan. Always at your best, an excellent write. A seven and into my faves goes this Sedoka. Hugs....MIKE. XX Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 2/13/2016 6:43:00 AM Thanks so much for your lovely comment Mike I do appreciate your support:-) hugs Jan xx

Poet Destroyer A Date: 1/28/2016 9:09:00 PM Jan, Congrats on your interesting win. Love LINDA -- Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/29/2016 7:54:00 AM Thanks Linda:-) hugs Jan xx

Sara Kendrick Date: 1/25/2016 1:26:00 PM Enjoyed reading this one..I could feel the brides emotion..Congrats on your win..Sara Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/26/2016 1:45:00 PM Thanks so much Sara:-) hugs Jan xx

Dan Cwiak Date: 1/20/2016 3:56:00 PM No apology needed for this winner Jan. Great write. Congrats on your win. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/23/2016 8:27:00 AM Thanks Dan:-) Hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich Date: 1/19/2016 3:59:00 PM oh yes, I remember this one, Jan. Big congrats. You did a "story" one like I did!! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/23/2016 8:26:00 AM Thanks Andrea I enjoyed this challenge:-) Hugs Jan xx

Joseph May Date: 1/18/2016 6:34:00 PM Congrats on a great win Jan Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/23/2016 8:26:00 AM Thanks Joseph:-) Hugs Jan xx

Judy Konos Date: 1/18/2016 3:27:00 PM Congratulations....on your Number Won! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/23/2016 8:26:00 AM Thanks Judy I wunned :-) :-) Hugs Jan xx

Skat A Date: 1/18/2016 10:34:00 AM JAN, Congrats on your "SEDOKA FORM (Rhymed) winning poem." love SKAT** Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/23/2016 8:25:00 AM Thanks Skat:-) Hugs Jan xx

Beautiful Scars Date: 1/18/2016 10:02:00 AM I loved this Jan. It is different and it really stuck out because of that. Thank you for being a part of my contest! *smiles*-luloo Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/23/2016 8:25:00 AM Thanks LuLoo I love the challenge of the contests to stretch my poetic ability:-) Hugs Jan xx

Judy Konos Date: 1/13/2016 12:52:00 PM Don't know what a Sedoka is but this is a great poem to accommodate it.... Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/13/2016 3:49:00 PM It's my first attempt Judy I just go with the flow of my pen:-) hugs Jan xx

Scott Thirtyseven Date: 1/9/2016 6:00:00 AM Nice spirited write. Best of luck in the contest. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/9/2016 8:50:00 AM Thanks Scott:-) hugs Jan xx

Eve Roper Date: 1/8/2016 8:34:00 PM Well done :) good luck in the contest! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/9/2016 8:50:00 AM Thanks Eve:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich Date: 1/6/2016 8:32:00 PM hey, WELL DONE on this challenge, Jan. I did one about a lady too!! (yet to be posted of course) How many poems do YOU have on the back burner now? Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/7/2016 10:45:00 AM My reserves are low and my muse is on holiday:-( hugs jan xx

Paul Callus Date: 1/6/2016 4:33:00 PM Who would dare do that to you, dear Jan?!! It's his loss after all:) You have done a lovely Sedoka, and the rhyming is excellent. ~ Hugs // paul Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/7/2016 10:44:00 AM Thankfully pure fiction for me Paul:-) hugs Jan xx

White Sage Date: 1/5/2016 4:19:00 PM excellent write and a nice picture, that's why I do advice marriages to be filled with some securities, at least if the guy realised how tough marriage could be, and tries to run...you know...your writing is superb dear Jan Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/5/2016 4:22:00 PM Thanks so much for you lovely comment:-) hugs Jan xxx

Harry Horsman Date: 1/5/2016 4:18:00 PM Oh i love this form, and you do it proud Jan..love this,,happy new year Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/5/2016 4:22:00 PM Thanks Harry its my first attempt at this form I do love the contests to inspire us and challenge us:-) Happy New Year:-) hugs Jan xx

Dan Cwiak Date: 1/5/2016 3:19:00 PM Terrific write, Jan. I am not very familiar with the form, but I will have to look it up and perhaps give it a try. (Only because you have done such a marvelous expressiveness with it.) Good luck in the contest. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/5/2016 3:28:00 PM Aww thanks Dan - it is my first attempt at the form : )I have to go with the flow of my muse I can write happy or sad and it is no reflection on my feelings just depends on how my stroppy muse is at the time lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Eric Boddie Date: 1/5/2016 2:08:00 PM when a bride is jilted....all the flowers become wilted....then the scorn brings aggression....which is done with a profound expression....like slitting tires or car windows destroyed by bricks....that's why I stick with God because drama makes me sick....nice write jan....;) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/5/2016 2:45:00 PM Thanks for the lovely comment Eric:-) hugs Jan xx

Nette Onclaud Date: 1/5/2016 12:20:00 PM simply stunning despite the slight gloom, jan.. haven;t seen this contest yet.. huggs and more smiles! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/5/2016 12:51:00 PM Thanks for the lovely comment Nette - it is a sad poem but I have to go with the flow of my pen:-) hugs jan xx

CayCay Jennings Date: 1/5/2016 9:15:00 AM Oh, so good. I like this and think it should do well. I'm holding off a bit on posting mine. So far, your muse has been most generous this year .... CayCay Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/5/2016 12:19:00 PM My muse was misbehaving and came up with a sad poem - hopefully she will start getting the humour back soon:-) hugs Jan xx

Demetrios Trifiatis Date: 1/5/2016 5:16:00 AM A bride's nightmare incarnated in a brilliant writing, dear Jean. Good luck! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/5/2016 12:19:00 PM Thanks Demetrios:-) hugs Jan xx

Afolabi Muideen Date: 1/5/2016 4:21:00 AM A sad write, though brilliant. Good luck within............A.M. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/5/2016 12:19:00 PM Thanks so much Afolabi and Happy new year:-) Hugs Jan xx

Skat A Date: 1/4/2016 6:57:00 PM the pain that is bestowed upon the groomless bride, his loss honestly it'll make a woman strong within aside from feeling the hurt .... enjoyed your entry it was a pleasure reading:) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/5/2016 1:27:00 AM Thanks Skat:-) hugs Jan xx

Emile Pinet Date: 1/4/2016 5:48:00 PM The poem flows with a steady beat and the words say everything by evoking thoughts within the reader's consciousness. This is a well penned poem that not only describes a state of mind , but makes an attempt to instill such thoughts within the reader's mind through great imagery and triggered emotions. Emile. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/4/2016 5:50:00 PM I always enjoy your comments Emile - you always take time to analyse what a writer is hoping to portray:-) hugs Jan xx

Dalia Shahein Date: 1/4/2016 5:41:00 PM Beautiful words my dear, glad I've stopped by to read it....hugs / / :) dalia Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 1/4/2016 5:42:00 PM Thank you:-) hugs jan xx

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