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Abandoned At the Altar

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ABANDONED AT THE ALTAR
You cast me aside Like an unloved old rag doll You no longer wanted me. Jilted as your bride Your betrayal took its toll Where is my apology? No explanation Has been uttered by your lips - I was waiting at the church! Humiliation As my life is torn to strips … forsaken, left in the lurch. Contest: Sedoka Contest Sponsor Laura Loo Checked with how many syllables 5,7,7,5,7,7 01~04~16

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016




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Date: 2/12/2016 7:25:00 PM
Hi Jan, another excellent write from your pen. Your words paint a sorrowful vision that is so true for some. The deep emotions sing true and they do touch the heart of he reader, bringing forth deep emotions. The sorrowful Imagery feels so real. The picture also adds to the words Jan. Always at your best, an excellent write. A seven and into my faves goes this Sedoka. Hugs....MIKE. XX
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Jan Allison
Date: 2/13/2016 6:43:00 AM
Thanks so much for your lovely comment Mike I do appreciate your support:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/28/2016 9:09:00 PM
Jan, Congrats on your interesting win. Love LINDA --
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/29/2016 7:54:00 AM
Thanks Linda:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/25/2016 1:26:00 PM
Enjoyed reading this one..I could feel the brides emotion..Congrats on your win..Sara
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/26/2016 1:45:00 PM
Thanks so much Sara:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/20/2016 3:56:00 PM
No apology needed for this winner Jan. Great write. Congrats on your win.
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/23/2016 8:27:00 AM
Thanks Dan:-) Hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/19/2016 3:59:00 PM
oh yes, I remember this one, Jan. Big congrats. You did a "story" one like I did!!
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/23/2016 8:26:00 AM
Thanks Andrea I enjoyed this challenge:-) Hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/18/2016 6:34:00 PM
Congrats on a great win Jan
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/23/2016 8:26:00 AM
Thanks Joseph:-) Hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/18/2016 3:27:00 PM
Congratulations....on your Number Won!
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/23/2016 8:26:00 AM
Thanks Judy I wunned :-) :-) Hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/18/2016 10:34:00 AM
JAN, Congrats on your "SEDOKA FORM (Rhymed) winning poem." love SKAT**
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/23/2016 8:25:00 AM
Thanks Skat:-) Hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/18/2016 10:02:00 AM
I loved this Jan. It is different and it really stuck out because of that. Thank you for being a part of my contest! *smiles*-luloo
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/23/2016 8:25:00 AM
Thanks LuLoo I love the challenge of the contests to stretch my poetic ability:-) Hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/13/2016 12:52:00 PM
Don't know what a Sedoka is but this is a great poem to accommodate it....
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/13/2016 3:49:00 PM
It's my first attempt Judy I just go with the flow of my pen:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/9/2016 6:00:00 AM
Nice spirited write. Best of luck in the contest.
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/9/2016 8:50:00 AM
Thanks Scott:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/8/2016 8:34:00 PM
Well done :) good luck in the contest!
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/9/2016 8:50:00 AM
Thanks Eve:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/6/2016 8:32:00 PM
hey, WELL DONE on this challenge, Jan. I did one about a lady too!! (yet to be posted of course) How many poems do YOU have on the back burner now?
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/7/2016 10:45:00 AM
My reserves are low and my muse is on holiday:-( hugs jan xx
Date: 1/6/2016 4:33:00 PM
Who would dare do that to you, dear Jan?!! It's his loss after all:) You have done a lovely Sedoka, and the rhyming is excellent. ~ Hugs // paul
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/7/2016 10:44:00 AM
Thankfully pure fiction for me Paul:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/5/2016 4:19:00 PM
excellent write and a nice picture, that's why I do advice marriages to be filled with some securities, at least if the guy realised how tough marriage could be, and tries to run...you know...your writing is superb dear Jan
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/5/2016 4:22:00 PM
Thanks so much for you lovely comment:-) hugs Jan xxx
Date: 1/5/2016 4:18:00 PM
Oh i love this form, and you do it proud Jan..love this,,happy new year
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/5/2016 4:22:00 PM
Thanks Harry its my first attempt at this form I do love the contests to inspire us and challenge us:-) Happy New Year:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/5/2016 3:19:00 PM
Terrific write, Jan. I am not very familiar with the form, but I will have to look it up and perhaps give it a try. (Only because you have done such a marvelous expressiveness with it.) Good luck in the contest.
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/5/2016 3:28:00 PM
Aww thanks Dan - it is my first attempt at the form : )I have to go with the flow of my muse I can write happy or sad and it is no reflection on my feelings just depends on how my stroppy muse is at the time lol:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/5/2016 2:08:00 PM
when a bride is jilted....all the flowers become wilted....then the scorn brings aggression....which is done with a profound expression....like slitting tires or car windows destroyed by bricks....that's why I stick with God because drama makes me sick....nice write jan....;)
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/5/2016 2:45:00 PM
Thanks for the lovely comment Eric:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/5/2016 12:20:00 PM
simply stunning despite the slight gloom, jan.. haven;t seen this contest yet.. huggs and more smiles!
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/5/2016 12:51:00 PM
Thanks for the lovely comment Nette - it is a sad poem but I have to go with the flow of my pen:-) hugs jan xx
Date: 1/5/2016 9:15:00 AM
Oh, so good. I like this and think it should do well. I'm holding off a bit on posting mine. So far, your muse has been most generous this year .... CayCay
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/5/2016 12:19:00 PM
My muse was misbehaving and came up with a sad poem - hopefully she will start getting the humour back soon:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/5/2016 5:16:00 AM
A bride's nightmare incarnated in a brilliant writing, dear Jean. Good luck!
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/5/2016 12:19:00 PM
Thanks Demetrios:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/5/2016 4:21:00 AM
A sad write, though brilliant. Good luck within............A.M.
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/5/2016 12:19:00 PM
Thanks so much Afolabi and Happy new year:-) Hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/4/2016 6:57:00 PM
the pain that is bestowed upon the groomless bride, his loss honestly it'll make a woman strong within aside from feeling the hurt .... enjoyed your entry it was a pleasure reading:)
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/5/2016 1:27:00 AM
Thanks Skat:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/4/2016 5:48:00 PM
The poem flows with a steady beat and the words say everything by evoking thoughts within the reader's consciousness. This is a well penned poem that not only describes a state of mind , but makes an attempt to instill such thoughts within the reader's mind through great imagery and triggered emotions. Emile.
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/4/2016 5:50:00 PM
I always enjoy your comments Emile - you always take time to analyse what a writer is hoping to portray:-) hugs Jan xx
Date: 1/4/2016 5:41:00 PM
Beautiful words my dear, glad I've stopped by to read it....hugs / / :) dalia
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Jan Allison
Date: 1/4/2016 5:42:00 PM
Thank you:-) hugs jan xx
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