Notes About The Poem

For Robert James Liguors' Zoltar Speaks Poetry Contest

ZOLTAR, Fortune Teller Machine, Brighton Pier Stock Photo ...

A Zoltar Encounter

I stood in front of a Zoltar machine
having very little money.
Before I could put a dollar bill in,
I heard: “Can I help you, Honey?”

“Excuse me? What?” I said with a start.
“How are you talking to me?”
That crazy guy in gypsy guise
laughed and said, “Fiddle-dee-dee.”

“Fiddle-dee-dee?” I then replied.
“Is that the best you’ve got?
Tell you what, can I get my fortune
whether I pay or not?”

“I’ll tell YOU what,” he said to me,
“If you’ll do a little dance, 
I’ll do your fortune. It’ll be free.
Are you ready to take your chance?”

“I need some music if I’m to dance,”
I said though I found him so weird.
His eyes were creepy moving around
and he had an ugly beard.

“Ok,” he said, “I’ll put on a tune.
What will you dance to for me?”
I looked around. If I were to dance,
I wanted nobody to see.

“How about ‘Gypsy Woman,’ I said.
“That seems appropriate.”
To this he replied, “And for you, dear,
I’ll also reveal your weight.”

“Now, listen here,” I said to him.
“A woman’s weight you dare not say.
Thus a wise fortune teller you can’t be.”
And with that, I walked away.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2026

Poem

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Liguori Avatar
June 28, 2026 at 2:50 PM
I never knew beards could be ugly!! 5th is yours.
Dietrich Avatar
June 28, 2026 at 3:21 PM
I hate beards. They are so almost always ugly
Crandall Avatar
June 20, 2026 at 10:53 AM
Haha, funny. Zoltar sounds a bit cheeky and fresh!
Rodrigues Avatar
June 18, 2026 at 7:38 AM
LOL…a lot of fun. You should have punched the glass…how dare he! This one is great…should do well!
Terry Avatar
June 17, 2026 at 2:14 PM
I laughed at the surprise twist at the end.
Dietrich Avatar
June 17, 2026 at 4:06 PM
thanks for telling me . I love that you did that
Poet Avatar
June 17, 2026 at 1:42 PM
Exquisitely composed poetry. Andrea, I like your style. A humorous poem, and you addressed him at the conclusion
Dietrich Avatar
June 17, 2026 at 4:06 PM
thanks, Sotto
DiMino Avatar
June 17, 2026 at 8:06 AM
Very cute, Andrea; he could not have much of a fortune -- maybe a small, beat-up lamp, at a thriftless store. Love it. Needed the laugh!
Dietrich Avatar
June 17, 2026 at 10:35 AM
Haha
Maverick Avatar
June 17, 2026 at 12:57 AM
Very good Andrea.' Made me laugh.)
Dietrich Avatar
June 17, 2026 at 1:09 AM
Thanks, Joe. I had fun with this one
Daniel Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 11:15 PM
Fun write, Andrea:)
Hind Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 8:15 PM
cute!!
Loving Iii Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 4:40 PM
Very becoming of a Gypsy. Didn't know till recently that Gypsies were from Egypt.
Dietrich Avatar
June 17, 2026 at 1:09 AM
By the way. I looked it up. Zoltar is actually a gypsy.
Dietrich Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 6:57 PM
hmmm, is he from Egypt? To me he looked like a gypsy!! Good grief.
Watts Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 2:59 PM
Ha Ha Andrea I like your style. A funny poem and you called him out in the end I had to look up amnitroponic to find out what it meant Lol Good luck in the contest Cheers Chris
Watts Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 2:57 PM
Ha Ha Andrea I like your style. A funny poem and you called him out in the end I had to look up Zolta to find out what it meant also Lol Good luck in the contest Cheers Chris
Buhagiar Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 9:13 AM
Wish I could see you dancing. Quite a fun poem.
Dietrich Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 1:09 PM
Thanks, Victor
Rodgers Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 8:22 AM
Dear Andrea, Ohh such pure fun. I love how you let Zoltar speak with that mix of mystery and mischief, and how the whole scene feels like it’s winking at us from behind the glass. You always know how to make a story sparkle without losing its warmth. Blessings, Daniel
Dietrich Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 1:09 PM
Thanks so much.
Empress Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 7:14 AM
Lol exactly never ever talk about a womans weight! Zoltar needs to learn better :,D dyn here of laughter! Sweet andrea you know how to write on any theme just effortlessly! Youve nailed this theme! Its such an interesting contest theme! I love the flow and the way youv delivered this one! Impressive! I think and I am quite intrigued by this zoltar! Surely a winner!! Hopefully top 3! Best wishes! Sending you light always
Dietrich Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 1:10 PM
Thanks, Ink. I wasn't sure about the word Zoltar but when I realized what it meant, I had fun just making up this story
Kendrick Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 5:22 AM
I liked the humor in this contest entry, way to go with this contest for a good contender it will be. Thank you for sharing and brightening my day. Way to go. Sara K.
Dietrich Avatar
June 16, 2026 at 1:10 PM
Thanks, Sara
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