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A Wedding

Loic Tran Avatar  Send Soup Mail  Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below is the poem entitled A Wedding which was written by poet Loic Tran. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

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The poem is below.


A Wedding

His lips are so sweet, he's wearing the perfect suit
Everyone say that we're the match that I shouldn't quit
Here I am in my dress with at the end my comfy seat
So tell me honey? Why I should quit.
So many people, my family, your and many strangers
The church steps, stepsisters and stepford smilers
They won't eat the cake until a wake
Am I holding your hand, or is it a benefit to take?
I love insects so why I'm wearing a mosquito net?
Apparently, difference is something to hate
His lips are so sweet, he's wearing the perfect suit
Everyone say that we're the match that I shouldn't quit
Here I am in my dress with at the end my mundane seat
So tell me honey? Why I shouldn't quit.
It's surely the best day of their life which you don't want to ruin
However, my mother is waiting for me in the limousine
The bridesmaid will need my bouquet, you deflowered her
I'm tired to kiss your shadow, I see a brighter outcome outdoor
Sorry my darling priest, it wasn't a test
I promise you that one day you will witness my best
One year later, one year later
Sorry, we didn't kept money for a narrator
His teeth are biting my neck, he's shirtless
My mom asked me if I was reckless and I'm fond of your face
All of this time you were under my bed
I wished I could have noticed sooner your head
Here I am my dear Priest, my dress is quite a mess
So tell me my love, will it be a yes?

Copyright © | Year Posted 2017

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Date: 4/13/2017 11:25:00 PM
Loic, congratulations on your win. I want to thank you for entering my contest. May you have Blessed weekend… ~*
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Tran Avatar
Loic Tran
Date: 4/14/2017 8:16:00 AM
Thanks^^
Date: 4/13/2017 3:17:00 PM
Hello Loic, nice to meet you. Welcome to Poetry Soup like Darren, said it is a sad poem. What should have been your happy day turned out to be a sad day instead. I rate your poem a 7.
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Loic Tran
Date: 4/13/2017 4:57:00 PM
Oh my god, thank you :D
Date: 4/13/2017 1:40:00 AM
The repetition in your poem is very effective. Your poem speaks of pain and anger and sadness the same time, on a day that should be a happy day. Welcome to PoetrySoup.
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Loic Tran
Date: 4/13/2017 7:24:00 AM
Thank you^^ Even though, I'm not sure about the rhyming between "deflowered her" and "outdoor".