A Scam With My Name On It

Up til now I have avoided a scam with my name on it, Despite it being tailored to suit me, Even wearing a bow tie, Appealing to my taste buds, With words smothered in chocolate, And smelling like my favourite rose, Tastefully wrapped up with $100 bills. All that was lacking was a hint of grammar, A modicum of common sense in sentence construction, Some more appropriate phrases, Evidence of an ability to spell check, And I might have been hooked. As one by one people I knew of were reeled in, I was busy patting myself on the back, And asking myself, how could they possibly fall for that, When even my cat could see through that, And why didn't they smell a rat, When you could spot the misuse of grammar, Without the use of a hammer, And the spelling mistakes, Could be found in the time it takes, For me to whip up some tea cakes. But Now, My confidence is down somehow, Maybe it is because when I read the papers now, I find articles without a hint of grammar, No common sense in sentence construction, Few appropriate phrases, No evidence of spelling ability, Or attempts at spellchecking Which leaves me sweating every time I go online, No longer able to tell the difference between a scam, And a leg of ham. I kind of wish I had never learned to spell, As even those without degree, Would not be impressed at my tempt, At spelling mistakes, So scamming is out for me, Unless I go back to school, And study journalism until my mistakes, Are plain to see. In the meantime, I feel safer, spending time with the cat, While she teaches me how to smell a rat.