A Gallery

A light went out when you left this world. I’ll never find that switch again, mark my word. The clock’s dinging; it is ten. The nightmare starts then. The sorrow and pain have not eased. Grief keeps following me, as pleased. It is so hard to forget you When I have a thousand reasons not to. I want to be strong and make you proud, As you are up there, watching me from the clouds. Watching me fumble, over and over, And you say, “That is my mother, I know her.” She is the core of our family. I know she will keep on going, even with this tragedy. She will find beauty in life, simple pleasures, And carry me with her as her most prized treasure. That is my aim: to honour you always. I want to seek out more ways To travel, to walk paths, hand in hand, To enjoy nature and the great outdoors—so many plans. So many plans that are ghosts. Nothing really matters now, on this slippery slope. I am sinking, and depression is welcoming me, Saying, “I will follow you, as grief is, to a degree.” Everywhere I look, I see a memory. Creating new memories with you in them will never be. I cling to the past, unwilling to let go, Wanting to feel your heartbeat, just so you know. That you were my world, for so many reasons, Through thirty years of seasons— So many, it seems, but so few in reality. I have your pictures everywhere, like a gallery. Searching in vain for a glimpse of life. There is so much vitality and shine, bright like a light. Oh, my little girl, this world is dark now. To keep speaking your name, I vow. I want to find a crack of light, Writing through the night, despite Not finding the perfect words, No rhyming or proper verbs. Will bring you back to me, except on paper. I am the author and the writer, Looking for the perfect ending For my broken heart that needs mending. Please give me a sign. Lay your hand on mine.