A Day

Wake up, time unknown. Let dogs out to their toilet. My toilet. Light, so morning. Possibly. Check time. Unpleasantly late, but earlier than yesterday. No energy. Wouldn't think that slept so long. But it was trapped in a seemingly eternal nightmare. Damn the scars my Father left on my mind. Check the checklist. Start the day proper. Take the time, feed dogs, fill water for dogs. Do some of days tasks. Damn I just want to lie down and die. Keep going, use music. Play strong, loud music. Keep going. Always keep going. Living is hard, dying is easy. A beautiful siren song calling all the time. Make dinner. Wash up. Try to keep mind from descending in on itself. Whatever it takes. Take pill. So small. One of the crutches keeping me from falling into the Abyss. So small. But mind is even more Hell without it. Time. Time passes again. Such a wonderful thing, time. Even in dreams and nightmares, time and clocks are beautiful. More music. Bed. Hope it's Oblivion or a dream. Hope my Father keeps away for tonight, in his dark Pit at the back of my mind... Wake up. Time unknown...