A Craving
a craving, a craving so bad you want it to hit every bone in your body. because it has before accept before, it hit, crushed, and grinded not only your bones but every thought you’ve ever had, every emotion you’ve ever felt and you’re heart, you’re ability to love and live.
but the craving, oh the craving. wanting to be wanted so bad because you’ve never wanted yourself. wanting to be wanted to love, and to live and to have a reason because you feel that wanting to get up every day isn’t enough.
and so you become satisfied with what you can get. constantly getting hit, crushed, grinded, stepped on, heart ripped out and stomped on the floor satisfied. why? because you’ve never loved yourself enough to know that someone really loves you.
finally, the need to no longer just become satisfied, because he comes, and he shows you how to grow, and how to love and shows you that you can be loved. he will show you that to love is not what you were giving, the smiles, the waves the body. but he will show you that to love is everything that was never enough; a voice, an emotion, a heart. he will show you that loving him will make you want to love yourself even if you spent years convincing yourself you could never love someone as damaged and as fragile as you. A damaged Fragile 16 year old girl.
and his voice, would feel like the warmth of a hug, the comfort you always needed without actually having to hear “it would be okay”.
his smile something handcrafted by the finest artists in the world, and you would get to lay my eyes on the worlds most beautiful smile. and everything would be fuzzy and happy and possibly make you a laugh. all until it wasn’t.
because a person who has no imperfections would have more than someone like you, a person with an uncountable number of no perfections.
he just like everyone else, despite how he showed you to love, despite the kind words and actions. he just like everyone else, will continue the cycle. only a fool would fall in love with someone so perfect that there’s too many imperfections to count.
it hits. crushed, and grinded not only your bones but every thought you’ve ever had, every emotion you’ve ever felt and you’re heart, you’re ability to love and live.
Copyright © Eden Garrett | Year Posted 2021
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