A Chemical Blessing
Waiting for that chemical reaction
That burst of sanity
To take effect
I gradually move
From the grey areas
Into the ever increasing light
Happiness encapsulated
In my tiny pill
Daily dose
Of normalcy
I wonder if I’ll ever be free
From these prescribed pills
And altered state
Of reality
But I think of the alternative
Remembering the horror
And demons of madness
Monstrous tears
Of imagined fears
Locked up in my room
As the world danced on by
Behind flowered pink and grey
Curtains of solitary confinement
Thoughts of death
A morbid lullaby
Notes tinged with premonitions
Who is the next one to die???
Life hangs from a thread
I lived a life tinged with dread
NO…I will not go back to that hell
Another day, another pill
I command my mind to be still
And just accept the dependency
At least there is constancy
Addicted to continuing on
To be able to sing life's song
I look at the light
And start to feel alright
By the time he awakes
I’m bubbly and great
I love him into the day
And I know it will be Ok
Now I’m who I used to be
From depression’s clutches free
Not everyone knows the struggle
How I often need a good cuddle
For in the end my troubled mind
Needs a love that is blind
To the monster’s that I face
And offers me sweet grace
Maybe myself one day I'll wean
And be completely clean
But for now…
the chemical blessing
I just what I need
To survive and thrive
To be truly ALIVE!
Eileen Manassian Ghali
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