Tom Cunningham Poet Limerick

A Bit of Humour For Sunday

SIR CONRAD

The great explorer Sir Conrad Justine 
Disappeared and was never again seen
Got too near the edge
Slipped on the ledge
Fell two thousand feet in to a ravine...

JIMMY

A bottle Jimmy found at the roadside 
Drank it all and was lucky he survived
Didn't read the label
Was drunk wasn't able
It wasn't whiskey but neat pesticide...

FRANK

Old Frank went for a ride on a rickshaw 
To visit the ancient sights at Mingtaw
Was having a good day
Until the seat gave way
His rear dragged on the ground till it was raw...

BO PEEP

A Shepherd girl called little bo peep
Was so drunk that she soon fell asleep
But it wasn't her day
She woke up in dismay
The wolves had eaten all of her sheep...

PETE

In a rain coat was the flasher called Pete
He loved flashing all his bits in the street
Girls said its too lame
So Pete upped his game 
He bought a strapon that hangs to his feet...

JOHN BECK

A sexy stud by the name of John Beck
Below had trouble cried out flipping heck 
He took some blue pills
To give girls their thrills
But all it did was give him a stiff neck...






Written 14 September 2019.

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Gershon Wolf September 21, 2019 at 10:36 PM I always like to tell you which ones I like best. This time it's 'Frank' and 'John Beck.' May the 'Limerick Force' continue to be with you, Tom! ~ Obe Wan Gershonobe Tom Cunningham September 21, 2019 at 10:48 PM Thanks Gershon, just working on a few more, it will be called Turkish holiday humour lol. Just watching the sun about to rise over the hills, an amazing sight that I never get tired of seeing. Tom

Jennifer Proxenos September 20, 2019 at 12:23 PM I adore your limericks Tom and your last two are deliciously saucy! Well penned Tom, Best wishes, Jennifer. Tom Cunningham September 20, 2019 at 12:37 PM Thanks Jennifer, glad you enjoyed, logging on when I can, greetings from Turkey. Tom

Heidi Sands September 19, 2019 at 4:31 PM You are a master at these Tom! Thanks for sharing :) Tom Cunningham September 19, 2019 at 7:14 PM Thanks Heidi's, glad you enjoyed, greetings from Turkey, I'm on my travels again, hope you're well. Tom

Lindsay Laurie September 17, 2019 at 7:30 PM G'day Tom … a few giggles with these limericks Tom. Keep them coming - Lindsay Tom Cunningham September 18, 2019 at 3:14 AM Thanks Lindsay, on holiday at the moment so I'll get composing. Tom

Carolyn Devonshire September 17, 2019 at 4:42 PM How I love reading your limericks, Tom! Thanks for posting these. I enjoyed all of them and think my favorites are poor Jimmy and Frank. What a hilarious image you present of Frank's rickshaw ride! Appreciate the laughs. Hugs, Carolyn Tom Cunningham September 18, 2019 at 3:13 AM Thanks very much Carolyn , travelling at the moment, greetings from Turkey. Hope you're well. Tom

Richard Lamoureux September 17, 2019 at 6:39 AM Hilarious, they are all good but John Beck gets the nod as the funniest. Tom Cunningham September 17, 2019 at 8:52 AM Thanks Richard, glad you enjoyed the humour. Tom

Eve Roper September 16, 2019 at 9:48 PM Enjoyed the humor in these limericks my friend. I needed a laugh. Hugs Tom Cunningham September 17, 2019 at 8:52 AM Thanks very much Eve, happy you liked them. Tom

Sandra Adams September 16, 2019 at 1:30 PM Lol always love your humorous limericks. The last couple were my favorites thanks for the laughs :) hugs Tom Cunningham September 16, 2019 at 1:33 PM Thanks Sandra, happy you enjoyed the humour. Tom

Swetha Vangaveti September 16, 2019 at 7:46 AM Jolly lines!! Delightful Tom :) Tom Cunningham September 16, 2019 at 9:55 AM Thanks very much Swetha, glad you enjoyed them. Tom

Andrea Dietrich September 15, 2019 at 7:10 PM oh my, these are your VERY best set I have ever seen. A few made me lOL. FAVE Tom Cunningham September 16, 2019 at 2:58 AM Thanks Andrea, I know they're supposed to be bawdy but just keeping under the radar lol. Tom

Ilene Bauer September 15, 2019 at 4:40 PM i hope you had as much fun writing these as we had reading them, tom! Tom Cunningham September 16, 2019 at 2:57 AM Thanks Ilene I did. Glad you liked them. Tom.

Silent One September 15, 2019 at 8:38 AM Great lims, and thank you brightening up the sunday.. Tom Cunningham September 15, 2019 at 9:11 AM Thanks S.O., happy you liked them, still warm sunshine here, don't know how long it will last. Tom

John Gondolf September 15, 2019 at 8:31 AM Great fun, Tom, thanks for the Sunday morning laugh. John Tom Cunningham September 15, 2019 at 9:10 AM Thank you John, happy you enjoyed the humour. Tom

John Lawless September 15, 2019 at 8:13 AM Sir Conrad was probably taking a selfie Tom Cunningham September 15, 2019 at 8:19 AM You're probably right John, on a seriously note many have fallen to their deaths trying to get the ultimate selfie. Tom

Vijay Pandit September 15, 2019 at 7:26 AM Each one uniquely a brilliant write--loved the humor, Tom. Tom Cunningham September 15, 2019 at 8:18 AM Thank you Vijay, glad you liked them. Tom

Arturo Michael September 15, 2019 at 7:17 AM I like the last three...it was fun Tom Cunningham September 15, 2019 at 8:17 AM Thanks very much Arturo, hope all's well. Tom

Panagiota Romios September 15, 2019 at 6:19 AM Good ones...the last is hysterical. Making this a FAV Panagiota Tom Cunningham September 15, 2019 at 6:33 AM Thanks Panagiota, glad I gave you a laugh. Tom

Anne-Lise Andresen September 15, 2019 at 5:47 AM - ... a lot of humor, Tom ... especially the last one :))) - hugs // Anne-Lise :) Tom Cunningham September 15, 2019 at 6:33 AM Thanks Anne, glad you liked them. Tom