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A Bit Of Humour For Sunday

SIR CONRAD

The great explorer Sir Conrad Justine 
Disappeared and was never again seen
Got too near the edge
Slipped on the ledge
Fell two thousand feet in to a ravine...

JIMMY

A bottle Jimmy found at the roadside 
Drank it all and was lucky he survived
Didn't read the label
Was drunk wasn't able
It wasn't whiskey but neat pesticide...

FRANK

Old Frank went for a ride on a rickshaw 
To visit the ancient sights at Mingtaw
Was having a good day
Until the seat gave way
His rear dragged on the ground till it was raw...

BO PEEP

A Shepherd girl called little bo peep
Was so drunk that she soon fell asleep
But it wasn't her day
She woke up in dismay
The wolves had eaten all of her sheep...

PETE

In a rain coat was the flasher called Pete
He loved flashing all his bits in the street
Girls said its too lame
So Pete upped his game 
He bought a strapon that hangs to his feet...

JOHN BECK

A sexy stud by the name of John Beck
Below had trouble cried out flipping heck 
He took some blue pills
To give girls their thrills
But all it did was give him a stiff neck...






Written 14 September 2019.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2019




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Date: 9/21/2019 10:36:00 PM
I always like to tell you which ones I like best. This time it's 'Frank' and 'John Beck.' May the 'Limerick Force' continue to be with you, Tom! ~ Obe Wan Gershonobe
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/21/2019 10:48:00 PM
Thanks Gershon, just working on a few more, it will be called Turkish holiday humour lol. Just watching the sun about to rise over the hills, an amazing sight that I never get tired of seeing. Tom
Date: 9/20/2019 12:23:00 PM
I adore your limericks Tom and your last two are deliciously saucy! Well penned Tom, Best wishes, Jennifer.
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/20/2019 12:37:00 PM
Thanks Jennifer, glad you enjoyed, logging on when I can, greetings from Turkey. Tom
Date: 9/19/2019 4:31:00 PM
You are a master at these Tom! Thanks for sharing :)
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/19/2019 7:14:00 PM
Thanks Heidi's, glad you enjoyed, greetings from Turkey, I'm on my travels again, hope you're well. Tom
Date: 9/17/2019 7:30:00 PM
G'day Tom … a few giggles with these limericks Tom. Keep them coming - Lindsay
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/18/2019 3:14:00 AM
Thanks Lindsay, on holiday at the moment so I'll get composing. Tom
Date: 9/17/2019 4:42:00 PM
How I love reading your limericks, Tom! Thanks for posting these. I enjoyed all of them and think my favorites are poor Jimmy and Frank. What a hilarious image you present of Frank's rickshaw ride! Appreciate the laughs. Hugs, Carolyn
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/18/2019 3:13:00 AM
Thanks very much Carolyn , travelling at the moment, greetings from Turkey. Hope you're well. Tom
Date: 9/17/2019 6:39:00 AM
Hilarious, they are all good but John Beck gets the nod as the funniest.
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/17/2019 8:52:00 AM
Thanks Richard, glad you enjoyed the humour. Tom
Date: 9/16/2019 9:48:00 PM
Enjoyed the humor in these limericks my friend. I needed a laugh. Hugs
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/17/2019 8:52:00 AM
Thanks very much Eve, happy you liked them. Tom
Date: 9/16/2019 1:30:00 PM
Lol always love your humorous limericks. The last couple were my favorites thanks for the laughs :) hugs
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/16/2019 1:33:00 PM
Thanks Sandra, happy you enjoyed the humour. Tom
Date: 9/16/2019 7:46:00 AM
Jolly lines!! Delightful Tom :)
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/16/2019 9:55:00 AM
Thanks very much Swetha, glad you enjoyed them. Tom
Date: 9/16/2019 12:10:00 AM
Your limericks will always be popular.
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/16/2019 2:58:00 AM
Thanks very much Victor. Tom
Date: 9/15/2019 7:10:00 PM
oh my, these are your VERY best set I have ever seen. A few made me lOL. FAVE
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/16/2019 2:58:00 AM
Thanks Andrea, I know they're supposed to be bawdy but just keeping under the radar lol. Tom
Date: 9/15/2019 4:40:00 PM
i hope you had as much fun writing these as we had reading them, tom!
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/16/2019 2:57:00 AM
Thanks Ilene I did. Glad you liked them. Tom.
Date: 9/15/2019 8:38:00 AM
Great lims, and thank you brightening up the sunday..
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/15/2019 9:11:00 AM
Thanks S.O., happy you liked them, still warm sunshine here, don't know how long it will last. Tom
Date: 9/15/2019 8:31:00 AM
Great fun, Tom, thanks for the Sunday morning laugh. John
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/15/2019 9:10:00 AM
Thank you John, happy you enjoyed the humour. Tom
Date: 9/15/2019 8:13:00 AM
Sir Conrad was probably taking a selfie
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/15/2019 8:19:00 AM
You're probably right John, on a seriously note many have fallen to their deaths trying to get the ultimate selfie. Tom
Date: 9/15/2019 7:26:00 AM
Each one uniquely a brilliant write--loved the humor, Tom.
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/15/2019 8:18:00 AM
Thank you Vijay, glad you liked them. Tom
Date: 9/15/2019 7:17:00 AM
I like the last three...it was fun
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/15/2019 8:17:00 AM
Thanks very much Arturo, hope all's well. Tom
Date: 9/15/2019 6:19:00 AM
Good ones...the last is hysterical. Making this a FAV Panagiota
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/15/2019 6:33:00 AM
Thanks Panagiota, glad I gave you a laugh. Tom
Date: 9/15/2019 5:47:00 AM
- ... a lot of humor, Tom ... especially the last one :))) - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
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Tom Cunningham
Date: 9/15/2019 6:33:00 AM
Thanks Anne, glad you liked them. Tom