‘In mythology, the phoenix is an immortal bird that cyclically regenerates or is otherwise born again. While it is part of Greek mythology, it has analogs [of, relating to] in many cultures, such as Egyptian and Persian mythology.’ – Wikipedia
Introducing the latest poetic form in my stable of designed forms: Phoenix sixain.
The design of the Phoenix sixain, invented by Suzette Richards (22/12/2024)
- It is a 6-line verse (sixain means a stanza of six lines).
- Choose five consecutive lines from one of your older poems.
- The sixth line consists of a word from each of these 5 lines, preferably in sequence; therefore, a 5-word line. You may tweak the words to suit the grammar and flow of the final piece.
- Rhyme and metre are optional, and the syllable count per line is irrelevant.
AS ILLUSTRATION
I recognise your weirdness
for it is my own* weakness.
You’re the mirror of my mind
as we lie† still entwined
in the intimate darkness.
Weirdness owns* mind – entwined darkness.
[The 5 lines are from my poem, Weirdness (2012)]
OPTIONS
- The original 5 lines may be a single stanza (verse) or part of a longer poem; the 6th line would resonate with this in its repetition of the words and may employ enjambment between lines 5 and 6.
- *An example of a homonym in practice.
- Changing the original poem by inserting a comma, thereby changing the meaning of the word and the sentence. Example: ‘still’ (adverb TO adjective): as we lie still, entwined …
- Here are further examples for line 6:
- Recognise weakness, mirror entwined darkness.
- Your weakness; minds entwined, intimate.
- Weirdness, weakness of still darkness.
- Et cetera.
The 6th line needs to be coherent and effective, for example:
‘Recognised weakness of laid darkness’ creates an intriguing and evocative image, but the use of ‘laid’ may not be ideal in this context. The word ‘laid’ is the past tense of ‘lay’, and it might not convey the intended meaning here. ‘Entwined’ (from the 4th line) would be a more suitable word; therefore, Recognised weakness of entwined darkness.
MY EXAMPLE POEM
[The 5-line verse is from my poem, Where do Birds Go when they Die? (2014)]
A Woman’s Longing
trailing her fingers through the crystal water
momentarily leaving a disturbance
soon to return to a calm mirror
believing woman’s love to be brief
driven mad by the longing and griefw
water momentarily return woman’s longing
© Suzette Richards 12/22/2024
*Homonyms, in linguistics, broadly defined, are words that sound alike and spelled the same, but have different meanings, eg pale: (n)—fence stake; (adj) wan; (v) become whiter.
†Lie vs. Lay
We’re all pretty clear on the lie that means an untruth. It’s the other usage that trips us up. Lie also means to recline: “Why don’t you lie down and rest?” Lay requires an object: “Lay the book on the table.” Lie is something you can do by yourself, but you need an object to lay. It’s more confusing in the past tense. The past tense of lie is—you guessed it—lay: “I lay down for an hour last night.” And the past tense of lay is laid: “I laid the book on the table.”
From the article, dd 20 June 2015:
20 misused English words that make smart people look silly (qz.com)