Richard Bailey, An Amazing Guy
Several of us were playing penny ante poker in Richard Bailey’s dormitory room on a rainy Friday afternoon. Now Richard was older than the rest of us. He was from Brooklyn and had already served in the U.S. Coast Guard for three and a half years. Still, he was a freshman, just like the rest of us living in Naifeh House, Cross Center at the University of Oklahoma in 1964. Word was out that, in the summer, Richard was a dealer in Reno or Las Vegas. Only a couple guys believed that to be true, but Richard was usually the “big winner” in our penny ante games.
Suddenly, Richard grabbed the deck and handed it to Stewart Lane. “Shuffle and cut.” Stewart did as told, then returned the deck to Richard. While he spoke to us, he shuffled the deck several times. He said he was going to tell us a story using the cards. That the Three of Hearts would be the servant of the King of Hearts throughout the story, doing his bidding faithfully. He stopped shuffling, cut the deck again, and took the top card, showing it to us as he did. It was the King of Hearts. Richard said, ”Once upon a time, there was a king…” Richard cut the deck again and took the top card, showing it to us as he did. “…who called his servant, the Three of Hearts….and there was the 3 of Hearts. He said, “I am King, but I am lonely, without friends. Go forth and find me some friends.”
Shuffle. Someone cuts. Richard takes the cards and starts shuffling again while he continues the story. He draws the top card and says, “The servant returned…” and there is the Three of Hearts in his hand. “Sire…” and the King of Hearts is the next top card “I have brought you three friends worthy of a king.”…..and the next three cards are the Kings of the other suits.
Shuffle. Someone cuts. Richard continues, “The kings…..and he lays out the 4 kings….soon become lonely for female companionship. So, the servant….and there’s the Three of Hearts on top…was summoned. “We are lonely. Find us suitable female companions.”
Shuffle. Someone cuts. Richard takes the cards and starts shuffling as he continues his story. “The servant….and there was the Three of Hearts on top…returned to the kings ….and there are the four kings next in line…and said, “I have returned with female companionship worthy of kings.”….and there are the four Queens AND THEY ARE IN THE SAME SUIT ORDER AS THE KINGS!!!
Shuffle. Someone cuts. Richard takes the cards and starts shuffling as he continues his story. “The servant….and there was the Three of Hearts on top…returned to the kings ….and there are the four kings next in line…and said, “Sire, you and your Queens”….and there are the four queens…”will be expecting some entertainment, so I have hired the Four Jacks.”….and there are the four Jacks….
IT WAS AMAZING, so smooth and seamless and there was more. Now, Richard’s complete story – a version I can’t remember all of - used up all the cards.
Stewart Lane was one of the onlookers in awe. His father was a plant manager for a playing card factory operation in Oklahoma City...Bicycle cards, I believe. They produced cards for everyday folks and cards for popular casinos. They also produced Bingo cards. Anyway, Stewart was in complete awe of Richard’s ability with a deck of cards. He wanted to challenge Richard somehow, but what to do?
Well, Stewart had his father make him a deck of cards with no Ace of Spades. It would be complete and normal in every other way, but it would not have an Ace of Spades. So, as Fate would have it, we were playing penny ante poker on another dreary day. Suddenly, Richard twisted the deck of cards we were using, making 104 pieces out of 52 cards. I’ve always wondered how someone can do that. Anyway, Richard said, “Surely somebody has a decent deck of cards.” Stewart saw his chance. He ran down the hall to his dorm room and got the “special” deck, the deck without an Ace of Spades. He had told me about the deck and we wondered how long it would take Richard to figure out that there was no Ace of Spades. Stewart handed Richard the deck. With just one hand, Richard showed off a little as he deftly removed the cellophane wrapper, split the paper seal with his thumbnail, opened the box, removed the cards, discarded the joker and the “instruction” card. He quickly shuffled one time. He paused, seemed to be weighing the cards in his palm. He had a funny look on his face. Suddenly, he fanned the cards out on the table and, in less than a second, he had scanned the deck and asked, “Where’s the Ace of Spades? He had felt the weight of a single card missing from the deck!! One card!! And identified it almost immediately!! No one ever doubted Richard’s ability with playing cards again.
On another occasion, five of us, including Richard, were at Windsor Lanes in OKC. He was his league’s selected bowler competing for a Champion of Champions title derived from beating the best of the many leagues in the state. The competition had come down to one game between the two best bowlers of the tourney for all the marbles.
His competitor started getting a little mouthy and, to all that could hear, pledged his victory as “a sure bet.” Richard, usually very mild mannered, took immediate offense. He bounced up from his seat like he springs in the cheeks of his ass. “Hey, Mr. Mouth. I can out roll you in my bare feet with a house ball! You want that bet for $500!?” Now $500 was a pretty nice chunk of money in the very early spring of ’65 and we were shocked that Richard had come up so hard and was willing to bet so much. The competition looked at Richard, looked at all his buddies, and his pride said, “You’re covered.” What happened next was a competition to remember.
Strike after strike after strike. Neither seemed able to miss the pocket. Mr. Mouth was a helluva bowler, but Richard was matching him, ball after ball….and Richard was using a 15 pound house ball. He wanted a 16 pounder, but said that finger fit was more important. Both were featuring 270 - perfect games - going to the 10th frame. Mr. Mouth was very excited and he attempted to stare down Richard for a moment. Richard was calm, wiping his bare feet with a towel and smiling. Mr. Mouth set up. He’s making his approach. It’s a beautiful ball heading for the pocket, but…oops. The ball slid a little in the oil that had moved toward the rack as the game went on. It caught just a little too much head pin, leaving the 6 pin and the 10 pin standing in the corner. Mr. Mouth was beside himself. You could almost feel his disappointment. He made the spare easily. Despite his rude verbosities, Mr. Mouth was a competitor. He gathered himself and threw one more strike for a 290.
“Damn good game!” Richard said as Mr. Mouth returned to his seat. The pressure was on. It was going to take all Richard’s confidence to do three more times what he had already done nine times. Richard picked up his ball and set up where he had set up all game long. Suddenly, he changed his placement. Oh, it was a couple of inches to the left; but it was a definite change. Even Mr. Mouth was surprised and offered us a quizzical look. Richard released the first ball. What!? He was throwing a straight ball…no curve whatsoever. It slammed into the pocket and cleared the deck. We were all mesmerized. He picked up his ball from the return and went to the same spot on the approach. He did it again….a straight ball. Again, it cleared the deck. All he needed was one pin to win. He looked over at Mr. Mouth with a cold stare and asked, “Do you have your money ready?” He turned, picked up his ball and set up in a new spot. Before he started his approach, he turned and smiled and said, “Brooklyn is my home.” He let go the ball and it was a perfect left pocket hit….a Brooklyn strike. Richard had rolled a perfect game in bare feet with a house ball....and he had shown that he was in compete control of his game.
In a absolute show of class, when Mr. Mouth approached him with the $500, Richard told him to buy us a round of beers and keep the money. He told the guy it was a privilege to play against a player so skilled and thanked him for the competition. Yes, it was a show of real class.
On another cold and wet Friday in February ’65, I went down to Richard’s room to see if there was a poker game. I found Richard putting duct tape around the inside edges of the windows. I asked what he was doing. He said he was going to blow a “smoke horn”. About that time, his room mate Mickey showed up. He overheard what Richard had said and asked, “What the Hell is a smoke horn?” Richard rolled his eyes and said, “It is three concentric smoke rings with a smoke ball in the middle. Forms a cone that’s called a “horn.” By this time, a couple of others had shown up and were wondering what was going on. Richard told us to find a place to sit and to be very still. He shut the door to his room and locked it. He put a large bath towel at the base of the door and duct taped the remaining three sides. His only words of explanation: “We don’t want a draft.” Someone asked if he had every done this before. “No, but it can’t be that hard.” He calmly responded.
We all found a place to sit and be still. I happened to be in a place where I could see the smoke rings from the side and see their reflection perfectly in the dresser mirror. Richard took out his Between the Acts cigarillo. He said they make thicker smoke, easier to “control” the outcome. He lit the cigarillo and took a couple of drags to get it going well. There it was…the first smoke ring. It seemed to grow and was slowly rotating when Richard let loose the second smoke ring. It was smaller than the first; but it too seemed to grow and also rotated. From my viewpoint, I could see only one large smoke ring rotating very slowly. They were lined up perfectly. I glanced in the mirror and there was a “target” being formed. Just then, the third smoke ring emerged, smaller still than the second. Again, from my viewpoint, I could see only one large thick smoke ring, slowly rotating. In the mirror, there was a perfect target. Now, Richard did what I have never been able to do….blew a smoke ball. I can blow lots of rings, but no smoke balls. The smoke ball went through the center of the smoke ring target. As it travelled through, it pulled the rings, smaller rings further than the large ring. It did it! It did it! It formed a cone or a “horn”; but in the mirror, it was just a perfect smoke ring target…two dimensional; but, in the room, it was a perfect 3 dimensional “horn”.
Was there no end of strange things this man could do? I have often wondered what Richard did with his life and if his strange skills ever helped him or set him apart. Yes, Richard Bailey was truly an amazing guy.
Comments