Deep and Submerge
It's weird being in this motionless situation. I'm not moving forward or backward. Nor am I raising above a height I haven't been. I also can't say that I am plummeting to my end. I am just here. Floating in an ocean of dark blue water like existence. Even knowing that I can not bring myself to become depressed about it. Or maybe it is not my cycle of depression yet and it will be in a matter of...seconds, minutes, hours, possibly days? I can't recall when I started life like this. If I had a life before this that is. I can not say. Maybe this is all I have ever know. Not even the waning yellow and white light up above can tell me how long this life has been going on.
Just going to have to except
The constant flow of my life is getting harder to break from. It is easy to stay like this. To move along as the waves of the water tell me to move. Whatever choice I may have had to escape has been lost for far too long. Maybe quietly sinking to the bottom wouldn't be so bad. But how I'm floating doesn't leave me much of a choice to move in any direction. So here I guess I'll stay. Deep in the big dark blue.
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