Confession of a Writer (version 2)
There are some things that all of you didn’t know, the other things that I like or should I say I want. Here’s another part of it but this is not a summary about the name I used when I write, yep you heard me or should I say I’m just kidding hahaha…
Most of us have different experience when it comes to love, yeah you heard me I’m one of them am I?
A lot of people don’t know what exactly the reason why I always fail when it comes to love but some of them know the truth about it, it’s okay if some of you don’t want to hear it, it’s okay I’m not forcing you to listen.
The first confession is about how I got my pen name when I write, this time it’s not (for the second time).
Here’s another story about myself that some of you don’t know, the reason why I wrote unsaid feelings.
Wayback 2007 I met a girl thru chat named Dianne, at first I have no idea what to say about myself co’z that time I was a student, at first we change information about ourselves, in the end we talk on the phone until one of us surrender, it’s either tired or sleepy.
Everyday it’s a routine between the two of us even sometimes I act lazy but everytime she text my laziness is gone co’z when she talked about something including her day in school I feel relaxed co’z everytime we talked I thought I was in heaven because of her angelic voice, even guys can’t say no to her, one time while talking to her she tell something about her love life, here I am to listen and give some advice even sometimes I act useless but I try just to make things better even some of my advice is out of the blue..
Another thing happen again when she call, when I answer her call ,I felt some sadness because she’s crying and hard to talk all I do is wait for her to stop crying just to know the reason why, after a long minute she tells everything it’s because of the guy she love, after that conversation she cut the call, later on she text me just to say thanks even in my head it’s nothing co’z I think I’m not a big help
After a month she’s okay even she keep on talking the same guy when she call, here I am still listening to her sometimes we laugh together even i teach her on how to be strong for something in the end accidentally I think I’m inlove with her but I ‘ve tried to keep it for myself co’z I don’t want to end our friendship so easily because of my foolishness.
Two or three months past, were still friends but sometimes I said something weird about the feeling I have for her in a funny way, deep inside of me she knows what I felt but she keep on ignoring it but that’s okay because it doesn’t matter anyway.
One thing happen, that’s the right time to her how I feel but unexpected happen, she doesn’t like me and that’s how I feel bad about it because that time I told her everything or what to do when someone confess his feeling for her, in the end she did what exactly I told.
At first I feel so mad, we change words but no explicit co’z I ‘m not like that I do it in a nice way or maybe a little sarcastic, after that incident I tried to ignore her and focus on my studies because I’ve waste so many time and I didn’t think for myself to enjoy life, a month past, I’m in a relationship but it’s a long distance relationship, but something happen again.
She text me just to say hi, I replied just like the first time I talked to her and back for being friends, one time she tell another guy that she truly love but the guy is not giving her some attention and one thing that pop thru my that I can never forget that time, she want to be with me but I reject her offer co’z that time I’m in a relationship but deep inside of me (before you refuse me but now you’re coming back just to be with me sorry I don’t like you anymore, your fate is still the same if you keep to be like that).
After that we never talked again because I keep on ignoring her no matter what, another month past she text me again just to know what happen, she’s a little bit shocked because of the things I said about my relationship status but in the end it doesn’t matter anymore.
A year past we didn’t talked too much because of being busy from school until I graduate and become a writer, even in the first place she doesn’t know what I really do, she text me again just to say hi, we talked everything co’z year past, we talked about everything including our love life but my answer about that is zero because I want to enjoy my life a single person and focus for the things I do, I told her I become a writer and she’s happy for what I did, I told her my first blog and feel free to visit it when she’s not busy but that thing didn’t happen but that’s okay.
One thing happen again something pop out thru my head for a better title for the poem that I want to write, after that I think hundred times for the exact word that all about her, in the end I’ve finish it, one thing happen she’s in a relationship and I’m happy for her because I think the guy would never break her heart, even I said to her that I want to give the poem I wrote but she refuse but that’s okay, the word unsaid feelings is just another story that will never be fade.
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