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Alexa Birch Poem
When I first saw you, you were just another pretty face in the crowd, another student, another stranger. But one night that all changed.
Suddenly I saw you in a new light. You moved from stranger to friend in the blink of an eye. You captured my attention.
Weeks went by and our friendship grew. You never knew my feelings for you, but what could I do? Several relationships passed by as I watched you love and get hurt, wishing I could ease the pain.
I played the "just friends" part well, almost too well. I wish I had had the courage to tell you how I felt; but I remained silent. I was afraid of your rejection.
Finally things changed in my favor. You started to take an interest in me, and my heart jumped for joy. We spent time together and my feelings for you grew in leaps and bounds.
You were my first kiss, and to this very day, you still don't know. We weren't together, but everyone looking at us from the outside would know the difference. You were my Romeo and I was your Juliet.
It was perfect for a while, but then life hit us like a ton of bricks. Suddenly everything fell apart and I was pulled into the swift undertow. I was losing you . . .
I did everything I could to salvage the pieces, but there were too many and I couldn't do it on my own. You said you were leaving me and my heart shattered. I tried to hold it in, tried to play it off as insignificant, but you saw through my facade.
You said I was strong, but in that moment I felt so weak. You said you were "just a guy" but my heart protested the thought. You meant the world to me, but you didn't believe it.
You couldn't see the tears coursing down my cheeks. Could feel the pain tearing though my heart, or hear the unspoken words in my mind, "I think I'm falling in love with you".
Copyright © Alexa Birch | Year Posted 2016
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Details |
Alexa Birch Poem
Every time I see your face the feelings come back. Happiness and contentment, but also pain and sadness. A longing for what once was, and a resentment for the present. I can't staunch the flow, can't turn it off. They work their way into my system leaving me feeling empty and lonely.
Why'd you do this to me? I though I meant something to you. I guess it wasn't enough. I wasn't enough. You wanted more than I could give, and when I couldn't give it to you, you moved on. Leaving me . . . whole on the outside, but broken on the inside.
I'm torn between wanting you and hating you for what you've done to me. I don't desire to want you, but I can't help it. Seeing your face brings back a sliver of hope that I can't quench, no matter how hard I try. A hope that someday things will get better, that we can go back to the way things used to be. A hope that you'll be satisfied with what we have.
So now I'm waiting. It's foolish I know. Waiting for the day when you realize that you gave up on something special. Of course I'll always be here, a smile hiding the pain. I'll be your friend, even your best friend, we can just pretend that nothing ever happened. We both know that's not true, but who will ever know?
I guess I'm an idiot for ever thinking that we could be anything for real. For believing that you actually cared about me. And for believing that you actually wanted to be with me. You proved to me that fantasies will never be reality and that they're too good to be true.
Copyright © Alexa Birch | Year Posted 2016
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