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Alexander Mac Poem
I can't sleep
My mind races and I can't relax.
I shiver in the darkness and my nose is cold.
I stare at a screen, thumbs poised to pounce,
Maybe you think this conversation is getting old.
I can't sleep now.
As a jingle rings in the silence
My heart thumps out of time
A tap onscreen to read, then a smile
To make me this breathless should be a crime.
I don't want to sleep.
My thumbs are tapping without my control
But they know just what I want to say
I picture you smiling in the darkness like I am
I wish I could see you the next day
I should be asleep now.
I type my goodbye seconds later
Just for you, a personalised goodbye
Burying my nose under blankets
I'm so happy that you are my guy
I'm falling asleep.
A chime in the night, I lift up my phone
See the reply, I am breathless once more
Lay my head on the pillow, thinking to myself
"How was I living without you before?"
I hug my pillow and fall asleep smiling.
Copyright © Alexander Mac | Year Posted 2016
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Alexander Mac Poem
Hearing his name in your voice
Oh, its unexpected, this pain
Such a small but sudden sting.
A contradiction I wasn’t ready for.
Your voice, something I associate
With joy and beauty and awe.
With his name, which never before
Has carried so closely this green eyed
Bite.
I thought maybe if I waited, no.
Maybe if I told you-
I should tell you before this goes too far.
I should tell you I’m an option.
I should tell you how unworthy he is in my eyes.
But this has already been going on for months, now I see,
And you’ll overlook me.
And I am unworthier than he.
Maybe, no.
Copyright © Alexander Mac | Year Posted 2017
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Alexander Mac Poem
It strains against chains
that hold it bound.
It dies a thousand deaths
slowly it drowns.
It is told 'No, no, no'
but it just wants a chance.
The head screams 'just let it go'
so it is forced to dance.
it dreams of freedom
it wants just to run.
it wishes things were simpler
like when it was young.
it screams like a banshee
of the pain it is wrought.
It cries late at night
as the chains are pulled taut.
It feels almost empty
like it's missing it's parts.
all it needs is a smile
one of many tortured hearts.
Copyright © Alexander Mac | Year Posted 2016
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Alexander Mac Poem
Golden, shiny, polished,
my cage is gild in hope.
I try not to fall,
but it's such a slippery slope.
I could stop now,
it's not to late to turn back.
With my heart in tow,
I'd get my life back on track.
Oh, how I'd try!
But what good would it do?
While I'd stop wanting to cry
I'll never stop wanting to see you.
Life would be boring,
a book with no plot!
I'd be alone in my cage,
with no key in the lock.
Copyright © Alexander Mac | Year Posted 2016
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Alexander Mac Poem
As a baby, she smiles,
Dances and trips on her feet
Pale hair shines from the sunlight
They all smile, "isn't she sweet?"
As a young girl, she knows to laugh,
As it hides all the fear she must hold
She can wait all she wants for her shining knight
He will leave her outside in the cold.
As a young girl, she sings,
Telling us as clearly as she can
Of the man who made her this way...
The man with the eerie white van.
As an old woman, she runs,
From the memories that chase her
The ones that haunt her each day
She's crying for young girls in the future.
Copyright © Alexander Mac | Year Posted 2016
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Alexander Mac Poem
A friend said
Her heart was hurting
Because her love had never met her
And stood far away
On a stage she couldn't share
Oh it hurt
And I couldn't tell her
How much worse it is
To know your love
And your love to not know
That every second they are near
It hurts
To know them deeply
Collecting secrets and facts
That make you love them more
Sitting beside them and
Hearing a heartbeat you wish to share
Hearing all the words but the ones you want most
I couldn't tell my friend that my heart breaks
More for myself than it does for her
More because of my love
And less because of hers
And my heart does break
Each day I look in his eyes
And I see the possibility of us
As I see him blindly overlooking it
And another piece of my heart falls
And I know he will step over it when he leaves
Because it is a hundred times harder
To be so close and then lose
Than to lose before you are close
Copyright © Alexander Mac | Year Posted 2017
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