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Evan Sachs Poem
UNBREAKABLE
I don’t mean indestructible or incorruptible
Something smashed to bits that CAN be fixed
As in unbreak my heart
It’s a quality absent in my situation
I can never go home again
This just leaves making a new start
Carte blanche to reinvent
Being sent to prison is not a blessing
In disguise or otherwise
An opportunity perhaps
Were that all, I’d call it a sweet deal
But let’s keep it real
Starting from scratch is unnatural
Playing by ear feels *****
All parties may heal in due time
Try to find some peace of mind
But until they design a way to rewind
I’ll still have left a scar behind
Maybe he’s more resilient than I give him credit for
In the face of the unknown
My best chance is to assume the worst-case scenario
That’s rather scary, though
You hear about the vicious cycle of child abuse
I worry it’s begun anew
He’ll follow in my footsteps too
Do as I was wont to do
I’d rather dwell on this **** than be overly optimistic
Downplay my legacy
Say I’m not the enemy
The monster in the closet
Or under the bed, lying in wait to eat your head
If I do, I’m screwed when what’s true gets through
Plus I admit
A certain benefit
Never questioning for a bit
What I did to deserve this
My sins are surface
I did it on purpose just to hurt him
Now he’s got permanent pronoun status
Would that we could unmeet
Unbreak, that would be neat
Copyright © Evan Sachs | Year Posted 2016
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Evan Sachs Poem
THE GREAT WALL
It’s funny and this is true
Years ago, I thought hopefully of being locked away
I envisioned more of an institutional setting
Nothing to do but roam in my robe
Fingertips lightly brushing the sterile, white walls as I go
No responsibility
No need to even say a word
There’d be talk of Crazy Sachs
Staring into space, wandering wordlessly
Much of this has come to pass
The walls are green and I’m a bit more verbose
But there is that talk
And not much is asked of me besides being seen not heard
I offer this anecdote
For it is the second biggest example in my life
Of the difference between fantasy and reality
Novelty fades fast
Occasionally instantaneously
Expectation begets exaggeration
Excitation leads to exasperation
All in all, between dreams and evil schemes should be a Great Wall
Mine was more an invisible fence
I passed through and was aghast to view the consequence
Slashed through thick vines for a sick crime
I was them first two pigs
Dicking around with straw and twigs
Unhinged when the wolf blew in
hit bricks because the walls were too thin
You can’t always get what you want
But if you try sometimes, you might find
What you want isn’t what you get once it’s got
Now you have to lie down in an unmade cot
Ruin, subvert
Cause one to hurt
Feel lower than dirt
That’s it in a nutshell
Just swell I’m in a jail cell
Bars make for a fine wall
Look, not touch at all
Plan how to build
With my unskilled
Hands that killed
Nearly
Copyright © Evan Sachs | Year Posted 2016
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Evan Sachs Poem
Catharsis by Evan Sachs
When your heart’s passed the hard part
And made it to the sweet spot
When you beat the box
When you’ve lifted the unliftable rock and been uplifted
The gift you’ve been gifted is called beneficence by the faithful
Far from hateful
It’s being able to breathe…finally!
Something touchy-feely.
Well…you feel a touch
It’s much. much. much. much…
It might even be All.
Copyright © Evan Sachs | Year Posted 2016
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Evan Sachs Poem
Glass Half Shattered
I find my thoughts are often quite destructive or productive
I try to turn the former into something more constructive
My name will live in infamy forever and a day
The loss of independence is the price I have to pay
I dream that putting pen to paper, publishing my woes
Can deter some other creep from traveling down the path I chose
I see these kindred spirits making headlines all the time
Using words like "sick and twisted" may be fair but they malign
All us who decided to be cruel and turn to violence
Linger long in jail or death and do our suffering in silence
But isn't that the way we did our suffering before?
And that just led to bodies bled and senseless acts of gore
The voices of experience in these deeds so macabre
Must speak out against indifference (consider that our job)
We have a second chance to leave a legacy of good
Cause I know I'd take it back if only there's some way I could
Try to piece together and repair half shattered glass
So there won't be any need to fly our flags at demi-mast
Copyright © Evan Sachs | Year Posted 2025
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Evan Sachs Poem
“I AM”
I am the leader of a one man processional
I am a consummate professional with no job and slim prospects
I am young at heart with an old soul
I am wrestling for control with me, myself, and I
I am a good guy, but not good enough
I am finding it tough to believe, believe me
I am 27, chow, yard
I am going to try, but I never said how hard.
I am a man of course, and a felon to boot
I am a mighty redwood without roots.
I am sitting alone in my cell with a pen
I am fitting to roam straight to Hell, say Amen.
I am anxious and restless and oh so much more
I am waiting to see what’s behind the next door.
I am an enigma, a something quite strange
I am what I am, but I’m willing to change.
Copyright © Evan Sachs | Year Posted 2025
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Evan Sachs Poem
From ES to ES
Here’s the thing
I don’t really know
What life would be if I declared the truth
I heard you say you were unlovable
Yet I declined to speak
A Delorean moment
An everlasting “if only…”
A coward’s regret
All of that and more
The life I could have had
A haunting presence as I pace my cell
It seems supreme but who can tell?
Here’s the thing
I haven’t got a clue
What makes you tick and gets you feeling good
I idolize your ever little nuance
Pretend I mean as much to you
A hypothetical perfect match
A theoretically blessed union
An ineffably joyous pairing
As only I could conjure up
The wife I could have had
A loving presence as I stumble through the day
Appears so dear but who can say?
Here’s the thing
I’m in the dark
As to the thing that could have made me yours
And now I’m sure you’ve heard the news
I hope at least it took you by surprise
An unspeakable crime
A horrifying action
A man you thought you know
Who used to make you laugh
The life we could have had
A sobering presence but I hope you’re living well
I bet you are but who can tell?
Copyright © Evan Sachs | Year Posted 2025
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Evan Sachs Poem
RHYTHM AND GREENS
I’m here cause I’m messed up and cause I messed up
Luck does not come into play
If you catch a bad break you can take it and make it work
Or wallow in your mistake and just ache and hurt
I’m always to be known as the sick jerk beyond control
Who pitched a fit, picked on a kid, and paid the toll
Hold up though, I don’t know where I should go
In the pantheon of notorious, inglorious foes
(I chose this life, I pulled my knife out
and sowed strife no doubt)
I’m not proud
I’m not gonna say that I’m not who you say I am
Whether I ain’t or am too is on you
All I can do is provide my side
I don’t intend to minimize or
Give lies that imply that I shouldn’t be despised
Keeping it real, that’s what’s up
That’s how you live up in the cut
Through the rut, the bad blood
Mad thugs getting no love
Holding a grudge just because
They got us under lock and key
Go back to the block in misery
And that’s where you remain
I ain’t saying just put on a happy face
We all want to be some other place
It’s not just four walls, it’s dozens
Inside, outside, try to climb get caught in the wire
I could have told you it can’t be done
Perimeter’s only breached by digging deep
Going down into the ground as a workaround
Or I guess you can just wait
Maybe forget to lock your gate
Take a stroll in civilian clothes before they close it themselves
Get some help from the outside
Pay a bribe or it’s suicide
All you gotta do is think outside the box
Even if they got you busting rocks
Shaking in your socks when the cold freeze cleans your clock
It’s not the end of the world
It’s still spinning, believe me
Try to relax, just don’t take it easy
Copyright © Evan Sachs | Year Posted 2025
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Evan Sachs Poem
It’s like solving a puzzle
Figuring out by introspection or divine providence
Which word goes where and how it goes there
, I’d trade a runner’s high for a punner’s high any day
It’s better that way, at least for me
An emotional dump and stress levels fall like Humpty Dumpty
This is my eighth poem in two days and I’m not even losing sleep
At least not any I can’t afford to lose
And what’s more prison’s no excuse
They can’t take this away from me
Not as long as I have pen and paper
Hell, even if they took that I could still compose
Just a bit more ephemeral in general I suppose
But it keeps me on my toes when the words I chose come together in the end
I won’t pretend it’s all about being brilliant
It takes happy accidents and coincidental turns of phrase
like “turn of phrase” and “happy accident” that have something poetical to em
I don’t create anything I just find the rhythm that occurs naturally,
And actually, if I over-think,
it stinks, it’s ruined and wrecked,
I move on to the next part and come back when I lack brain and have heart
I’d rather relieve my mind than my bladder
Splatter my troubles onto the page and watch the rage disengage
The hardest part for me is knowing when to stop
Copyright © Evan Sachs | Year Posted 2025
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