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Stefanie Jones Poem
Just a day
“Good Night Mom and Dad” I said before I went to bed. “We love you” they said as they closed the door
Mom comes in and wakes me up “Time to go to school” as my feet hit the floor
I got dressed and ate breakfast and got my book bag and now we are on the go
We sit in the car listening to music “It’s Friday I think I’m a little excited tho
“Alright baby we here” as mom open the door to let me get out
She closed the door and kissed me on the head told me she loved me before she pulled off
Another day of school and it close to Christmas
I can’t wait to see Ashley and Alexus, today is show and tell as I said in a whisper
We had learning center day and Boy! Was it fun!
Today was a free day and on Friday there isn’t much to learn
The room was quite when the was a knock at the door, the door opened
A man with a big gun was standing there; my classmates panicked and started to run
I heard a lot of noises and a lot of screams
I felt a sharp pain in my back as I dropped to my knees
In the distant I heard more screams and then everything went silent
Then I closed my eyes it went dark and on the cold floor I was dying
The other side
It’s Thursday night and off to bed we go
I kiss my 5 year old son Jaden and told him I loved him so
Alarm clock goes off and it’s around 6:15 in the morning
I shower got dress and woke up Jaden my little darling
Its Friday, I fixed him breakfast and we headed out for the this last day until the weekend
I enjoyed our little drives to school as we sat in the car singing
I opened the door to let him out once more
Kissed him on the head and told him I loved him ill pick him up around four
I’m at work drinking coffee just talked to my husband on the phone
Got at my desk started to work and the my office phone rung
It’s about 9:30 and it was Jaden’s school
I got the news he was dead and I started to puke
I’m crying uncontrollably don’t know my next move
My son is dead, I can’t believe this news
I hurried to the school in the best of my ability
I saw the school surrounded by medics, reporters, and police
I ran to a officer and demanded to see my son
He said “I’m sorry ma’am” I can’t do this at this time
At 9:32 my one and only son Jaden was pronounced dead
The shooter was 20 and took my son’s life in his own hands
The questions continue to flow through my head as I search for answers
I don’t need answers I need my son and his laughter
I am now sitting on his bed trying to swallow tears
My husband holds me close as reality nears
My little boy is gone among the other 19 kids
Heaven has 20 new angels now I hope he knew how much I love him as much as I did
R.I.P
(To the innocent lives that were lost in the Sandy Hook Elementary shooting)
12-14-12
Copyright © Stefanie Jones | Year Posted 2012
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Stefanie Jones Poem
Sometimes people tend to search for happiness on all the wrong places, when their back is against the wall that when you see all the terrible faces, where friendships are tasteless, love is waste less. Words come fast but are swallowed to forget, but comes right up to being a regret. Search you wont find, failure is constant in the mind, looking for clear signs, laugh to hide the cry. When is it worth the fight? Head so troubled at night. Who's wrong, Who's right? When ears tune you out from new insight. Closed minded, cold heart, selfish to something that once was there, the fear if rejection leaves you in a blank stare. Closed mouths don't get fed, but wondering eyes will get this message read. Somehow you seek defeat, the battle is already won. Heart beating triple fast like hearing the shot from a gun. Bite the bullet shadowed by pride, you can run but you cant hide. Greatness is easy to come by when your surrounded by followers, try to stand on your own first to see if your actions are thrown up by swallowers. Misery loves company, fakeness loves a crowd, searching for the real in you has never been found . Try and GPS this and see where it goes, nothing but a red stain on a white robe.
Copyright © Stefanie Jones | Year Posted 2016
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Stefanie Jones Poem
Crossroads
A man that cries alone is a man that dies alone
Living life through the words of a heart filled song
The heart beats to the rhythm of the soul which is hard to contain
The feeling of lost and rejection never can be maintained
If I should die tomorrow where will I go?
Give my flowers while I’m alive because when I’m gone I will never know
In life trials and troubles it seems like one way in and no way out
Doing the right thing but getting the wrong results leaves nothing but a fearful doubt
My past is my past so please don’t judge me
We live in the present so look past all my imperfections and know there is a future that I seek
It’s amazing how the finger points and the beam is blinding your eyes
The truth is always seen no need of a disguise
I died a million deaths and still I stand strong
I was never a follower of anyone because of these battles I have to fight alone
I failed a couple of times which most people liked it that way
They kicked me while I was down and only hoped that was the position that I stayed
But still I rise with a victory of a bittersweet taste
I turned and walked away but happily went back to pick up their faces
I don’t seek for revenge for you reap what you sew
Before your lips part and speak that vapor I will let you prepare yourself to take these notes
Copyright © Stefanie Jones | Year Posted 2012
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Stefanie Jones Poem
There was a time when I knocked at Hell’s door
Didn’t think nothing about it just walked through and explored
Was introduced to a lot, saw a lot of people with smiling faces
I walked by them, they whispered behind my back but remained nameless
I saw a friend of mine that I remembered at one time she had nothing
I gave her opportunity and love and a chance, and I was face to face with her she must have forgotten because she started fronting
Kept on walking until I ran into this dude I once knew, we talked for a while until his lies started to sound like truth
The longer I walked the more I saw, I was beginning to compare it to this life, but I wasn’t surprised at all
I ran into my best friend WAIT!? Why was she here? She knew all my secrets she is my heart I can’t believe this, I was overcome by a sudden fear
When we was in conversation nothing change it seem like any other, Then the more I listened she became transparent this time there was no running for cover
I recognized the liar, the cheater, and this mask she wore to gain attention; I stopped her in her tracks and told her to listen
I already walked through the gates of hell there is no longer a reason to lie, I gave my honest opinions and loved you like I love my own life
To my surprise she walked away without a comment, I understand because that’s why in Hell the soul is already burning.
When I walked back through the same door I entered, I realized a lot but I couldn’t be offended.
I went to the mirror to examine myself, I had some things I need to fix and yeah I could use the help
That walk help me point out my faults in me, back to reality but I can only change me
Copyright © Stefanie Jones | Year Posted 2012
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Stefanie Jones Poem
I thought it was love so I let the first hit go
"He's sorry, he didn't mean it, it's my fault it wont happen anymore!"
Some days were good, and with him is where I was supposed to be
It was that one drink too many and then my nose started to bleed
I cleaned myself up and got on my feet, went to the bathroom and cried out "Is it me?"
After another day passed he stumbled in late from work
Smelling like liquor, yelling, cursing demanding his plate
I went into the kitchen and gathered some food off the stove
He looked at the plate and laughed and threw it on the floor while his cigarette burned
He walked towards me and I knew exactly what was going to happen
He raised his hand and I fell to the floor and he started laughing
As time passed the more stronger I have gotten
Face didn't look the same from the bruises, swollen eyes and crying and fighting
Everyday it repeated but this time I was smart
I couldn't take this anymore because I knew death wasn't far
Again he came in drunk and running off at the mouth
I was sitting at the living room table reading the bible
Most people would say I was crazy or would try to seek revenge
I realized that it was easier to kill him and harder to be a Christian
He stood there stunned, but the rage didn't disappear
Around my neck his hands went" Don't fear God , fear me and death."
I was starting to blank out while I was conscious I prayed
Lord, I have not been the best person but please don't make this my last day
I guessed he noticed my action less body, he dropped and left
Keep God first, there isn't any man or person greater, with this I know I'm blessed.
Copyright © Stefanie Jones | Year Posted 2016
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