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Al'monique Vaughan Poem
Say queen what's your name?
in a moments delay, i caught a glimpse of your smile, looked in your eyes and saw someone i knew. someone i loved. a face of she that completed the entity of me holistically. I'm sorry your name is..
the spirit beckoned for my presence, i listened but in hesitation i declined the conversation. i remembered the moment my heart shattered into pieces with ends that would no longer be proportionate to any puzzle. the moment my breath became my suffocation, the more i swallowed i saw cloudy pictures i lost sight. i thought i was dying, no one to resuscitate me. she left me in that space hopeless.
speak again, what's your name?
the eyes delivered my trance, thoughts spinning, emotions flipping, i was turning into a ball of confusion, i heard the name but the familiarity was expelling too much energy, i couldn't find the rhythm of me lost in my memory, it's good to remember her, in fear i ran to the the lowest hole but climbed the highest and still didn't reach ground level. i still need her.
you asked my name...
the voice of my sanity, it rang like anita baker angel on a sunny sunday stunning sun rays beaming of the beams of my forehead, tingling the roots to the follicles of my tendrils. speak to me spiritually because verbally i submerge in blue hues with purple colored canvas i become a lush of words. speak to me emotionally with your hands covering mine, feel my pores into yours, drowning in love. whisper slowly in the pits of my being, i need your words to linger this moment may not happen again...
your name happines huddled around ampled eager evident total tenacity heighten humility eventually enmeshed rhythm rupture.
Copyright © Al'Monique Vaughan | Year Posted 2012
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Al'monique Vaughan Poem
tears streaming
I'm trying to fight but the moisture is winning
streamlining the outline of my cheekbones
to wipe would be a sin against the emotion that is so free.
im hurt,
my heart is heavy,
feels like im breaking
the logic of this is that im stupid and dumb
i know he could never be for me, he didn't choose me
he just used me to his advantage for an open raw love
a desire of untouched passion where he could escape his honeymoon,
to the institution of an engagement that has no formal labels.
i should've asked for more been a better woman not just the average queen.
i loved him surrounded my thoughts in him, my actions of new moves included
him, because i chose him to be my king,
well at least emotionally,
verbally i hid behind mental mask,
where i opted the choice of it's nothing, we just cool,
i got this,
im in control,
he won't get the best of me again.
but once again im crying the same damn tears,
he can't listen, ears are occupied with the owner,
lips glued shut he just offers me his eyes to enchant me in a bittersweet
seduction of lies.
this should have been a casual affair of basic physicality's, not saying it's what
i wanted but i know my body needed it.
i no longer stay burden with the lie that states he loves me,
that kinetic energy flows from spirit to spirit sinister remarks that keep me
entangled in the bitter web you weave, why couldn't it all be just so simple,
where i would be imperfectly fit just for you and you for me,
i just want to learn to let go,
let the memory of him fall in the drops covering my eyelashes,
i can't keep giving what i don't have to give,
as i stand, or as it should say from the look of my knees as i fall,
it wasn't suppose to be this way.
Copyright © Al'Monique Vaughan | Year Posted 2010
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Al'monique Vaughan Poem
im scared
the discovery of self inside of someone else is misunderstood education. im
not consistent with the principles of a relationship, im not even sure i
understand the mere foundation. the unbalance of man and woman is known, i
teach better than i live. the co-existence of kinetic energy on the sphere of
humanity, the perservation of eden, in the extension of adam and eve in their
purity. i find the complexity is not always intriguing can be exhausting but i
love from every sense. touch with my spiritual, feel with my mental, taste with
emotion, hear with soul interlock all with my physical b/c i dedicate my
existence to the definition of black love, the recovery of the love movement
where we lost us. it's me, im full of emotion i rise from 0 to 100 in a - 3
seconds, i expect submission b/c we're no longer children. i discovered it's too
much!! he after him always left me at the same space, thinking it was the lack
of knowledge in self, confidence and pride that dismissed them from my life.
without him i discovered it was me.
im scared
im not seeking the answer of why love but why hasn't it trusted me. the insane
asylum of love, i've committed myself to liberation rehab for those who can't
discern the mysteries of dedication to our better halves. my reflection is
painted on a water colored canvas, the colors have drifted becoming a blob of
mundane rhetoric, i don't care to define. i succumb to the desolation of gray
tint, until my artist conceives inspiration to paint with me.
im...........
rememberance without memories, a story that's told without solitude b/c i
forgot my pen to rehearse my serenity. FORGIVE ME!!
Copyright © Al'Monique Vaughan | Year Posted 2010
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Al'monique Vaughan Poem
i was in love head over heels knees bent waist deep in love.
palms sweaty mind racing emotion crazed blindsided nothing else matters
glued to he. my heart was bleeding the emotion never receiving he couldnt see
the connection. he was the description of my perfection perfectly flawed to be
my king. i was dedicated to the discovery of me inside of him.i was overly
submissive my usual submission upgraded to be. i didnt fight or challenge i
wanted to be easy like the flow of water. i wrote poetry b/c he inspired me. i
indulged in romance planned trips with gifts with wonders that made him smile.
i discovered floetry to be all he had ever dreamed in the interchangable. what
the heart didnt understand i fell in love at 15 he was my angel my gift we
disconnected so i latched to the boomerang effect came in u know that if it was
meant to be it will come back jive well it did again at 18 but i was feeling
myself to hard i couldnt be what he needed than at 24 i crushed him i wanted
that old thing back willing to fight because he was to be mine at 26 i tried to
sink my teeth in him b/c i knew he was the one.that he came again b/c this
was it i was ready. he made me nervous. caused me to blush . made my heart
flutter. reequired me to be the woman i was destined to be but we have now
transition to this.....nothing. i am consciously ridding him but my subconscious
resurfaces him just when i think i have let go, he has moved on but i continue
to live in the torture of love. i am openly addicted to romance to the
commitment and the institutuon of oneness. this spiritual love balance
madness.. my testimony to the mockery of misguided consciousness
the story contines in the book coming soon!
Copyright © Al'Monique Vaughan | Year Posted 2010
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Al'monique Vaughan Poem
i don't want to hear another love song, feel another connection of infinite
possibilities.
I don't want to go through question and answering
deciphering if it should be he tired of going through
the mundane oracles of tedious non-lasting interactions
with dream filled propitious creatures of non-substance pretending to be men.
I don’t want to hear the woes and aww’s of your lifetime, only to feel compelled
to hold you, rub your
Whispering it’s ok because im here.
I don’t want to waste my energy of useless phone calls of empty conversations
subsiding pretentious contacts of repetitive gestures.
I don’t want to understand how you need time because it feels real you are
just unsure of the man you should be
Because if you were the man you could be than I wouldn’t be writing this poem
I don’t want to listen to your rage of deception and butter licked lies.
I don’t want to show why im fit to be your queen ,
when it should already be obvious. I don’t want to teach you to want me,
oblivious gestures of spontaneous delights to adore me,
show you the opportunities to openly love me, only to give in to me,
b/c I taught you how to be with me.
I don’t want to have expectations of beauty and romance only to be
disappointed by consistent form of lack.
I don’t want to hear another justified lie why this just isn’t the right time,
but if im patient we’ll season to be something great in due time.
What I want is to be.
Beautifully potently fabulously illuminated desired by love,
by a man who knows what he wants and embraces it openly.
his smile is a reflection of me,
the escape from reality my sanction of perfect bliss in the midst of chaos,
the vacation i take without even moving, the melody to every note ringing in
my ear, the music we become,
just to hear him say hello on a day the sun is physically shining, but radiating
b/t the two.
i don't want to have another blissful moment, without the continuing of you..
Copyright © Al'Monique Vaughan | Year Posted 2010
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Al'monique Vaughan Poem
He walks to the rhythm of african drum beats,
the heart of a lion fractions of a coward
emotions heighten he becomes pensive questioning the belief of his GOD
is this really for me?
weathering through space and time his eyes are pinnacles to another realm of bliss.
onlookers seeking freedom
children of the most high seeking revolution
he quotes scriptures of his past time
words of theory from points he's gathered in his journey
i ask who is this man?
flesh silent
spirit speaking
he answered before his lips every murmured hello
i am he.
pharaoh, moses, ham, ra, amun, zeus, shango..
the knight of charisma
epitome of knowledge
the bearer of life
i am
not in for your keeping
whisper of the future the taste of your dream
standing in the field of jasmine encircled with lavender hues.
he breathes
intricate details to my entity
encompassing the totality of my sense of feminity
he created my transparency
i was only bare with he.
no mask no shell no fear he created a path of openess
i was glued
stories of unwritten moments, memories my dreams lived
he was the reflection of who i thought to be, forgetting in my trip through my heaven
he had yet to discover his kingdom,
but i had claimed my reign to his side as queen.
to the spirit of my ancestors
to the ears of my creator he was defined as my king
the one my heart forever locked to
he was my reflection, the soul my spirit searched for through lifetimes.
he is
i stay locked to his mission even in his absence, because the thought of another permeates
hesitation the brink of a failed submission of invalid truths of my heart because
i could never be dedicated with the key to me being in his hands.
i decline another hand to touch this skin and breathe upon this flesh,
i have been touched by royalty please don't dishonor my king.
he
is
my
destiny in the eyes of me
Copyright © Al'Monique Vaughan | Year Posted 2012
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Al'monique Vaughan Poem
they ask if i wanna be in love?
no, not even within 1000 miles of an emotion so unpredictable.
instead i wanna b liked real hard.
getting those call throughout the day b/c my voice rings through your head all
day.
texts when we can't speak, just to let me know you thinking of me.
phone calls before i rest my eyes,
so the last thought will be of you,
even though my mind is already on you,
i just wanted to hear your voice.
tickled me funny,
because he looks @ me as if he's seen the rarest jewel in the world.
movies on wednesday because we can go for half price,
and sneak and watch two more throughout the night,
walks on monday so we can speak in silence,
trying not to give too much thought about the nites we just had. we'll make
dinner on tuesday,
that's our prime time,
a board game or even cards,
i love it when you smile.
hesitant to speak with tied tongues,
because we may just choose to be in ....
nope,
i just want to be liked real hard.
where im wanted because im me,
our time is always the best,
b/c we're little kids again..
holding hands, skipping rocks,
secret treasure boxes with our favorite things,
wild adventures with dreams of our fantasies...
watching movies in the car at the park with the skies filled,
picnics with our toes digging in the grass,
reading passages from your favorite book,
even volunteering @ the local hospital or feeding the homeless b/c that's just
where your heart is..
it should just be so simple..
i smile,
he laughs..
am i reaching?
Copyright © Al'Monique Vaughan | Year Posted 2010
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