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Best Poems Written by Martin Howard Samuel

Below are the all-time best Martin Howard Samuel poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Martin Howard Samuel Poem

Anyone For Tennis?


I do enjoy verbal tennis
wordplay may be a game
outwit outsmart the opponent
is the only aim
lobbing phrases across the net
volley and rally back and forth
no one's a loser and yet
those precious few
who think on their feet
will always win have you beat
Shakespeare is the all-time champ
merely a player with poem and sonnet
through thick and thin he'd go for a spin
and put some English on it
it's fun for all with no balls or calls
and if your serve is up to scratch
unless words fail
at the thought you quail
it's word game set and match

Details | Martin Howard Samuel Poem

Broccoli, Brussel And Cuke


If in all innocence
broccoli brings out flatulence
not to dwell but how many unfortunate smells
will it impart from a single floret
and in the end when it rends
does it sound like a bassoon or clarinet?
And what about the brussel sprout?
No doubt it will create heady fallout
and if on the quiet you ever diet or fast
as you are and repeat all you eat
this gas too at last shall pass.
Also the humble cucumber
which on you may do a number
what light wind
breaks through yonder soft butt?
Smile if while seated at the dinner table
as you may be able to blame the mutt.

Details | Martin Howard Samuel Poem

Crocodile Symbiosis


The crocodile smile is such a pretty sight
as the Egyptian Plover keeps his teeth
pearly white and shiny bright
"Open wide," are words heard from the bird
his dental hygienist who picks and pecks
then eats the meaty spicks and specks
and as the crocodile sheds old choppers
(no tears)
so the avian's not unemployed or at a loss
the croc constantly grows new gnashers
for his new-found feathered friend to floss

Details | Martin Howard Samuel Poem

Chukar Plucker


On a recent trip I was gone
but not for long
to Eastern Oregon
where I saw my first chukar
(a partridge-like bird pronounced 'chucker')
which in time
compelled me to analyse
and revise
an old and pleasant pheasant rhyme
give it the feathery touch
and in the end
regale my Oregonian friends
with a resounding recital
of...
'I'm not a chukar plucker
I'm a chukar plucker's son
and I'm only plucking chukars
'til the chukar plucker comes'

Details | Martin Howard Samuel Poem

Crazy Train


Some with the gumption
who continually
jump to assumptions
and with no allusions
always arrive
at wrong conclusions
board the wrong train
again and again
and in total frustration
never alight
at the right station
off-track inference prevails
their train of thought
is off the rails
it's repetitive inanity
Einstein had a word for that
he called it 'Insanity'
and let's not forget those
excuse me for speaking
while you're interrupting
(he did mutter)
compelled to complete
every sentence I utter