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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
Monstrously Machievellian
Demonic pedagogic
Ominously Orwellian
Demagogic logic
Fools’ Musk-ovite mules
Zuckerberg zeitgeist heist
Dickensian dystopia rules
Google last post bugle
Fossil fuels myopia drools
Bellicose Bezos blows
Bro-ligarchy mates’ malarkey
Unions demonstrate
Amazon defenestrate
Hades Gates hierarchy
In the dock
Murdoch foxy skulduggery
Poxy TikTok runs amok
Crass puns..shock thuggery
This lot don't give a jot
.
Bitter sh**ter Twitter
Greedier needier seedier
The death of mass media
X marks the spot!
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2025
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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
Aren't many or any finer than Dan me ol mucker & china who now looks out for nightmare cooks or crooks making money off the books with rare meat on dirty hooks in filthy nooks but don't care want to give him a shiner for saying don't be hasty or cheat prepare pukka tasty tucker & succour...safe fayre to eat for every diner...
Owners booming hysteria at inspector criteria
Kitchens so unclean like a war scene in Liberia
Zooming in you find they're grooming Listeria
Rightly fuming that it is blooming like wisteria
Hardly stellar told fella to have old mortadella
Rank covered in dank mould stank in the cellar
Dan who's a fan of Paul Weller is a fortune teller
Scores on doors stop more spores of Salmonella
Suss some are no faff or fuss a them & us schism
Despairing whiners cuss not caring about criticism
Cleanliness next to Godliness just an anachronism
Foolish witticism as diners get ghoulish botulism
Out of date food they buy deny do things on the fly
Just comply no treason and here’s the reason why
If duff stuff you season on the sly to try and get by
The Council’s the fall guy as folks do die from Ecoli
Hunch lunch or brunch scare dodgy ware of tupper
Owners get shirty but it’s so dirty can’t serve supper
Ask my man Dan this is not a masterplan to scupper
A public sector inspector would rather have a cuppa
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2026
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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
Bubbling babbling burbling banter from the bar..
Sup hush….memory lane trip...Proustian rush..pleasingly tickled.
Plushly ebbed…spidery beer swirls webbed…lace whirls..grace dimpled dappled jar..
Perch...parched pagans besmirch..sip...druid fluid drip..Iris’s secular church..
Venerate yesteryear dips…commemorate Faustian fillips....teasingly pickled..
Smug treacle toned thatch rugs hugs sturdy slabs.. shrugs..
Tugs tussling tree torn trusses and trestles....
Trumpets tradition.. crisp crumpets in flames..sedition flickering..
Like sassy strumpets calling each other names…playfully bickering..
Remember the surreal cast….gayfully ethereal echoes..
Beacons blush in the embers of the past..
Classy pubs dripping with polished pewter.. parochial paraphernalia…ballsy brass...
Crepuscular charms. splinters splicing smokey shadows..
Wafting whispers.. across tobacco tinted tainted times..
Whistles whetted..quaffing…quenching ...cavorting with crannies..
Carousing with nooks naked in timber flannelled panels..
Canoodling on fecund bulbous bales farm foraged.. freshly fashioned...
Flirtatious follicle flicks....gurgling guffaws, raffish rascals' whisky whimsy..
Courting curious covens..sporting prosecco cackle cacophonies.
As sons become dad..in turn perched with their lad..
Lady lawyer betwixt a pimpled tyro…local employer, bumpkin on the giro..
Museums of marvels.. hoodwink misplaced metaphors..
Laced with a house pour of moreish memories of before..
That without impunity the nub of a pub..
The bar.. a community hubbub hub..
Gracious Landladies…loquacious Landlords..
Sagacious stars...near and far..
We raise our jar.
For our home from home..
A public house..
Ta..
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2025
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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
To the skies...cries of have we sinned..the seasons spinned...winter grinned as before it’s really beginned...spring’s been sneakily binned..
That bitter wind does cheekily blow...delivers tingling..slivers of mulled wine mingling shivers..oh and..shed loads of snow..
You know it is nature's calling card...as the bleached flurries hurriedly dart. ...shards of frosty farts falling hard....
Slippery slurries beached...frippery start to beseeched.. billow wisps like waspish wafts of blossoming willow..
Chuffed to see a lush plush pillow..fluffed...puffed..buffed..kept aloft from mush.. with crystals soft..silky..stuffed
A natural ebb and flow gush...a smattering...then a rush...splattering to and fro..
Winter’s web.. gleaming coats of teeming white bright light beaming notes...
Dreams of fairies schemes….streams across mystic moats..dairy prairies floats...
Scoops of snowy soup spills..stoops and swoops…down the hills..droops off daffodil troops..
Everything swathed..bathed in wintry tiding...the sodden sky pours... hints of sly footprints trodden hiding…
Huddling crystal clusters grasping.. riding..gliding…deciding detours…
Blizzard wizard’s rasping rally…cuddling..clasping.. contours of the valley floor..
Last post gong of our winter host boast.. sounds like a love song..
In this Proustian getaway... adore the festooned foray..
Marooned yet cocooned…this wild hideaway soon shunning..
Being wreathed in bleakly stunning cunning..
Turns back to being shrouded..sheathed in meekly clouded mild...
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2025
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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
Damn it the planet’s on fire
Concerning..right down to the wire
Burning on its funeral pyre spire
I’m for turning.. where’s the messiah?
A heavenly choir…so we can aspire
That learning will finally inspire
An endless yearning desire
Of spurning this friendless quagmire
Discerning things are rather dire
Churning of the palaver and ire
Mother nature does surely tire
Should be the crier & trier
Of another returning frequent flyer
Corporate pariah..or so called high flier
Deranged global warming denier
You can tell its hotter...getting dryer
The climate’s changed.. you liar
Mining anything shining..find a buyer
All about earning..will just retire
With their bounty…a comfy county squire
Or dicey fiscal rascal friar
Got devious egregious previous & prior
Pampered dining on pricey lobster & samphire
Us out of luck..stuck in the muck & mire
Tampered temperatures soaring higher
But no ruck ..chuck the entire earth in the fryer
They’ve scampered…we’re hampered in the briar
Does appall …no truck with their gall…yet remain a complier
Insane what they pluck.. yet we all still call them “Sire”
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2025
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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
Fickle sunbeams tickle fluttering daydreams...…
Lyrical lapping lullaby encores...
Gingerly stroke sandy shell shattered shores..
Starlings spy…sky high murmurations...
Skimming stones....slicing silky sheens..
Voluptuously verdant riddles…islands within idylls...
Scattered daffy darlings..dilly dally...
Sunshine splattered chlorophyll candles...
Animosity as an ersatz monstrosity shines…
Saluting highfalutin pomposity..devouring skylines..
Notes of cut grass gloats floats from..
Middle class mowed manicured marvels..
Criss cross collaborations… surf the tailored turf....
Billiards baize ablaze with petrichor whiffs
Festooned with afternoon nana nap snores..
The radio's heavenly hum of cricket scores...
A duvet of familiar riffs...murmurs of what if's..
An inkling..whispers of summer's sprinkling serendipity twinkling..
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2025
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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
Palindrome Poem...Reverse Verse about our Perverse Universe
(flip gravity.. what goes down must then come up - sorry..read down then back up)
"In this place we all call home
Monstrously Machiavellian
Doesn’t have to be
Islands of strangers
Ominously Orwellian
Tribal totems & talismans tome
Demagogic
Or
Pedagogic logic
Instead could still see
Rangers free from dangers roam
Embraces spaces for all races & faces
Riffs not tiffs with what ifs
Fracking probe..ransacking the globe
Attacking our cerebral lobe
Saluting high falutin polluting.. evolution?
The earth burns as it turns..on its axis
Heed the greed creed..poleaxes
Pay your taxes?
Plead to feed those in need
One man struggles while another relaxes
The solution…revolution?
Oceans just toxic potions
Due to noxious notions
Wary of the lairy scary Dairy Fairy
Much as I try.. won’t lie
Can hear that guy..Jamiroquai cry
Emergency on planet earth!
Red herring or derring do or die
Demonstration or veneration of deforestation
Placards do the hard yards versus lanyards
Deny or defy.. scorched turf?
What’s it worth?
Torched by the debauched
Wince..since birth a serf?
Log in to your singed noggin
They’ve binged..impinged
In the middle of a fiddle & diddle riddle
Damn it this is our planet
Taking the piddle
Avarice hubris bliss
In this place we all call home"
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2025
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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
Virat..never ersatz..fat cat with the bat
Look at record book stats in every format
Kerching bling King of tats
Vicious & pernicious in the ring
Kohli kidology methodology thing
Tit for tat..spit for spat
Bit of chit chat
Never ending..mind bending
No caveat..rat a tat tat
Doff your hat & all that
Could only be Virat
Parting platitude ”walking away with a heart full of gratitude”
Could fashion such passion..imbued and renewed..never did ration
Corking rude feud dude..talking..baulking
Stalking..attitude at any altitude or latitude
Memes about teams’ dreams out of kilter
Holy moly Kohli pout filter
Helter skelter belter..propensity for intensity & immensity
Willow Warlock at war
Shock & awe scores
Another blinding
Spellbinding run cascade
No dull lull draws
Just rapturous encores
Flayed and slayed by his masterly blade
Virat keeps composure despite heaps of exposure
Chiku knew he's in full view
Media..film crew queue
Leader but still one of the boys
Poise..no coy ploys.. despite the noise
Petulant up for the fight
Game reader..always right
Never reluctant to be truculent
Intransigent,belligerent yet diligent
Gifted superstar lifted the bar
No one else on a par
Move over for the incandescent
Luminescent…iridescent supernova
Going toe to toe with any foe
Standing proud…gung ho
Stealth in rude health..feathers ruffles
Scuffles and kerfuffles with the crowd
Even sometimes himself..out loud
Big hitter knew India had to get fitter
Their fanatical flair babysitter
Unique freak..demanding..technique and physique
The script..lets get ripped..or reprimanding
No more whim vim but vigour
Hustle..muscle & bustle in every tussle
The trigger...some gym rigour
Could not be clearer...end of magic era
Fans' Peter Pan Talisman of Elan
No-one would a tragic badger hold dearer
Kohli.. first one man band brand
Stopping Tests flopping..becoming bland.
Virat gave the oldest format a hand
Craved...saved and raved about his fave
Both mentor and depraved grand tormentor
As planned ...grandstand the Kohli brand
In the frame engraved as top
Hall of fame name
In the most beloved sort
Of this glorious sport
Have we seen…has there ever been
Fatter stat cat..old school yet new cool batter
Viral Virat spiral
Tribal bible revival & survival
Which no-one can rival
The game's ultimate mad hatter
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2025
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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
Has been a concern more than a bit of a bummer after months of the dumber & dumber IPL drummer couldn’t be glummer did discern my heart did desperately yearn for Test Cricket’s return and the true start of the English summer..
“Endless spell of hell fanned with pointless strand of “IPL” brand
Fascination with the same same machination.. don’t understand
Aversion to lame tame perversion of game they sell it’s so bland
Fell don’t feed gobby corporate lobby creed.. their greed banned
Stuck in a rut more windows shut tut tut but glut will still expand
Pray tell underhand coercion we plead indeed needs to be canned
Test veneration for deeds seeds sow grow in generation spanned
Still the longest format old hat damned like cricketing contraband
Hall of Fame heed lend a hand or best sort of our sport’s panned
Don't whine if for folklore you pine must draw a line in the sand
Not T20 farce but timeless class and your members pass scanned
No obituary atmosphere soaking and stroking my pituitary gland
Plenty more days of play encore holds sway.. bar dutifully manned
Raise a glass & use a comfy cushion for your ar*e.. getting tanned
Dad & his lad peruse grand views and hues from pews in the stand
No ruse planned muse evoking a beautifully green & pleasant land”
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2026
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Old Timer Rhymer Poem
Why is it such a big deal to be an avaricious & pernicious alligator and just steal from every creator use all our data and turn even the meek & mild into a wild hater...
"How do we stop the lavatorial plop plop of AI slop
Cull the new crop an arch oligarch march to the top
No behavioural fop to an algorithm making you strop
Don’t be a sop to a pack who hijack a stack on the hop
Pander to your dander by knowing how you do shop
When you gander…. propaganda & slander they drop
This laboratory of hateful oratory is what we all cop
Cohorts sport.. escorts all sorts.. come on chop chop
All about the economy give woke folks a lobotomy op
Forgotten besotten rotten dot com bubble did pop
Impropriety no jobs swap entirety of society will flop
Social media greedier needier seedier stronger gallop
So how do we stay dry of sh*t from on high this AI slop
To stop bottom feeder sly lie then no longer be the mop"
Copyright © Old Timer Rhymer | Year Posted 2026
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